Childhood days
by Jasmin 0583
Summary: The case of a missing teenager brings up memories from the past for Danny.
1. Default Chapter

Author's note : Hey folks, I'm back again with – yet – my second story. This one is already

finished, so I hopefully won't have difficulties to post regularly. Hope you

have as much fun reading it, as I had writing it.

Please RR.

Chapter 1:

It was deep in the night when the teenage boy silently entered the house by the kitchen's backdoor. He had locked his room from inside, had taken the backdoor's keys and had escaped through the window. He had been grounded for tonight, but he didn't care – he was supposed to see a girl tonight. That was much more important than any given, damn prohibition. He gently closed the backdoor and tried to get to the kitchen door as silently as possible so he wouldn't wake anyone. He knew he would be in really big trouble, if he would.

But he never even had a chance to cross the room – suddenly the room was enlightened brightly, much too bright for his eyes being used to the darkness outside. He winced and immediately closed his eyes as a security measure. He realized what this meant: someone had switched on the lights and he now was in deep trouble. He blinked with his eyes and could see the shape of two people, one sitting at the kitchen table, the other one standing behind her. His parents – his foster parents: David and Joane Matthews. He knew what they would tell him, before they even had spoken a word and he knew how this situation would end. He didn't care about their rules and their way of living, he didn't care about them believing they had a right to educaate him and judge about his activities. He was almost sixteen, he was independent and he didn't need these people. He was thankful they had offered him their love and support and he knew he actuallly owed them a lot, but that didn't change his feelings. He had no love for this people and no respect.

They weren't his parents and although they were getting along mostly – even if they didn't get along so very well – there were times when it was really hard living under one roof with them. He had let them know how he felt about them without having regard for their feelings and he had been rude and mean. He believed Joane had been very upset about it and David had been furious, but he didn't really get why – they had known they weren't his parents and he thought he had made it very clear to them, that – for him – they weren't. He was more like a guest in a hotel or even an ill person in a hospital – he was send here to be taken care of and his current caretakers received money for fulfilling their task. And like those people, the Matthews had no rights to decide about his life, but they didn't seem to realize it. There had been a lot of fighting and arguing about this question lately, but they wouldn't change their point of view and he had grown desperate and angry.

He had started to skip school, meet friends, stay out till the middle of the night, smoke, drink and have parties. Just to show them they couldn't do anything against it and that he was old enough to decide on his own. But they didn't treat him like an equal person – they had still treated him like a child, like their child and had grounded him for the weekend. But it had only made him feel more furious. He knew chances were low that the situation would improve, they wanted to take care of him as parents and he wanted to be respected as a grown up individual – somebody who could take care of his own. He also knew he couldn't stay here if they wouldn't change how they reacted to him and he had told them this too. But this wouldn't be the time to talk about it, this would be the time to listen to the Matthews accuses and their blames on him. How childish he was, how immature and that he had shown once again he was too selfish and carefree to live an indepent life on his own.

"Where have you been boy?"

"I'm not your boy..."

"Answer the question, Joaquin. I won't ask you a second time!"

He shrugged and gave them an unintersted look.

"I was out. I answered your question. Are you happy now? Can I leave now?"

"Don't you talk like this Joaquin Matthews. You're still living in this house and as long as you do, you won't disrespect us! So don't be soo precocious and arrogant! With who have you been and where?"

"It were my friends and it's my business where I have been. So, I won't tell you!"

"We're the one's that give you a house to live at, clothes to wear and things to eat. We are the one's taking care of your social security – so it is our business."

"You know what – I don't care..."

Now the psychological and understnading phase of the conversation would start, as his foster mom took the word.

"Joaquin, what are you so angry about? What's wrong with you that you are so carefree and willing to hurt us? Where's the problem?"

He sighed out loud and received a warning look from David for this.

"There's no problem and there's nothing wrong with me. It's you people that are having a problem. You don't understand that I don't need you!"

"You're 16 years old – you very much need us! What do you know about the real world out there? Have you ever had a job or have you ever had to pay for your bills? You wouldn't get along out there!"

"Yeah I know, that's what life is about. Thanks that you paid for me!"

"Joe, you know he didn't mean it like that. We love you, you're not here because we are paid for it!"

Joane tried to explain and tried to calm him.

"Don't call me that, my name's Joaquin. Don't ever call me that again!"

"Calm yourself, boy and don't talk to her like this! You may not see it, but you owe us a lot!"

David seemed to hesitate as he realized what he had just said and Joane shot him an astonished look.

"So, you want me to be thankful? That's what you want, you want a thank you for keeping me here, grounding me and talking to me like I was a child? That's what you want? Anything else – what about getting down on my knees and kiss your feet – would you like that?"

"Stop talking like this – right now!"

"And if I won't what are you gonna do? Call the police, call social care or do you wanna hit me?"

"Just because your father did, it doesn't mean I will do it too!"

Joaquin was left speechless by that. This had hit him hard. There had been a secret agreement not to talk about his corporal parents and insulting or blaming them was something that he never even would have imagined to come over one of the Matthew's lips, but now it had happened. He could see Joane's expression and he knew she was absolutely furious about what her husband just said.

"David! Shut up – you'll only make it worse! Joaquin, he didn't mean it, he didn't mean to hurt you. I'm sorry – he's sorry. You're sorry David, aren't you?"

He seemed honestly sorry when he told him.

"I'm sorry."

"That doesn't make it any better. I don't need your sympathy. But if you feel better in being sorry – okay. I won't stop you!"

"Joaquin, I really am..."

He wouldn't let him finish – he didn't get this goddamn audacity.

"Stop it! Shut up! I don't wanna hear about it okay! I don't wanna hear about your feelings and wishes, I don't wanna hear about what you think is right for me and I don't want to listen to your speeches. You have no right to even tell me anything and you have no right to judge about me and speak prohibitions!"

"We're your parents – we have any given right in the world."

Joaquin's voice was quiet when he answered to David's statement, much too quiet.

"No, you're not. My parents are dead."

Then – without another word – he stormed out of the kitchen and up the stairs, where he opened his room and locked himself inside of it once again. He could hear David yell after him, but he didn't care.

"Come back down here."

Than he couldn't hear anything else. He was on the edge of crying and he was desperately thinking about what to do next. He knew this endless fighting wouldn't stop. He wouldn't take a step and they wouldn't either and he knew he couldn't go on like this. He needed his freedom, his independence, his own life. Whatever he was going to do – he couldn't stay at the Matthew's house.

Down in the kitchen, Joane Matthews shot her husband a sad look.

"Why did you do that, why did you start with his father. We had an agreement not to ever do this. You remember?"

"I know and I'm sorry. I just lost my temper on him. Why is he acting like this, why is he talking like this? I don't get the boy. Where did we went wrong?"

"We didn't get it wrong. He's a teenager – David. It's just like this. Every parents have to go through this phase with their children."

"Just that we aren't his parents and he isn't our child – at least we have to hear this almost every day."

"I know it hurts you and it hurts me too. But he's right – he isn't our son..."

"But we are the closest thing to parents he has!"

"I know David, but we have to face the fact that he is growing up now. This is a difficult time for him. He's trying to find out who he is and the one thing he knows is that he isn't our child! He knows that for sure, the birth certificate tells it so. So I guess that's the reason why he's so angry."

"So he doesn't care about us any longer?"

"He still cares about us and he is greatful for the life we made able for him, but he can't show it and currently he can't accept that. We have to give him some more space and we need to give him time. That's all we need – a little distance and time."

"Yeah – and a lot of courage, faith and patience!"

She slightly smiled by her husbands' words.

"Probably – yeah."

"You wanna try to talk to him again, tonight?"

"Give him some time on his own. We will have a talk with him tomorrow."

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

A.N.: First of all – thanks for the reviews. Second I have to admit that posting regularly

doesn't necessarily mean often, for I'm only home at weekends right now. Please have

a little patience...

Chapter 2:

The next morning was a warm sunny day. It was showing nothing of the difficulties and angry words there had been yesterday in the middle of the night. Joane felt refreshed and encouraged to have a try and talk to Joaquin. Maybe he had slept over it too and had come to a decision, a positive decision – one that made him realize the words of the night hadn't been meant as bad as they might have sounded. Maybe he had realized they didn't mean to punish him, but really cared about him. She knew this was just a desperate dream – but maybe he was at least willing to talk to her.

She went down the stairs at first to make some coffee and set the kitchen table for breakfast. She went up again when the coffee was starting to drop down, to kiss her husband good morning and get some moral assistance from him before she would enter the lion's cave. She knew she couldn't take David with him. He had gone too far yesterday night and Joaquin would just be upset once again if he would join her. David was already awake when she came back to the bedroom.

"Morning honey!"

"Good morning."

"You already had breakfast?"

"No, I just set the table – we can have breakfast in about twenty minutes. Always taking into consideration I'm finished talking to Joaquin up to that point and we're both still alive."

"Don't you worry Joe. The boy had a whole night to think about it, to come clean with his own feelings. He can't still be mad at us!"

"You would be surprised..."

"You want me to join you?"

"No, I don't think that's a good idea. We would be one too many. You know he really wishes to be equal to us and if we are both going to talk to him, he will feel underestimated and treated like a child once again and I can't listen to the same old discussion once again this morning. I'll have a try on my own and we'll see what it'll lead to."

"I love you honey. You'll get along with him. I wish you all the luck in the world."

She smiled at him and turned around to leave the room.

"I'm in a desperate need of it!" she thought by herself.

She took a moment to find her courage, before she knocked at her son's room's door.

"Joaquin, you awake? Would you please open the door, I would like to talk to you."

There was no answer audible from inside. He probably was still mad at her and didn't want to talk to her.

"Please, Joaquin – open the door. Don't be mad at me. Just let me come inside and talk to me."

Still no answer – the desperation grew in her.

"I know we have been pretty rude yesterday, but I honestly mean this: we didn't mean to hurt you. I just wanna have a conversation with you – from person to person. This isn't a mother-son talk. I want us to find a solution, I want to listen to your proposals. Please Joaquin, I'm completely serious about it. Open the door."

She waited a few more moments, but there was still no answer and no movement inside the room. She sighed soundlessly. She had hoped this would be easier and he would be more understanding, but she obviously had been wrong. He wouldn't open up on her. She actually hadn't planned to do this, but he was leaving her no choice. She fetched the keys from her bathing-gown, she was wearing above her night-dress and searched for the keys to Joaquin's room.

"I didn't want to do this, but you're leaving me no choice – I will come in now, Joaquin."

She opened the door and halfway expected loud protest, something flying into her direction or the door being blocked. But nothing like this happened. She stepped into the room and surprise welled over her, followed by panic – all overwhelming, complete, pure panic. Joaquin's bed was made, his room was orderly and his cupboard was empty. There were no clothes inside, but the most worrying thing was the window. It was open. She frantically scanned the room for any sign of him or at least a sign of where he had gone to. A note, a letter or an opened diary – something like this, but there wasn't. She could feel tears rise as she yelled for her husband.

"David!"

She could hear him jump from the bed in the room next door and run across the floor.

"What's wrong?"

"The boy! He's gone – Joaquin is gone!"

"What do you mean – gone? Where did he go?"

"I don't know. He didn't leave a note or anything... But his clothes and most of his personal things are gone. He's gone, he ran away from us."

"Try to calm down honey. Maybe there's a logical explanation for it. Wait a second – I'll be back in a moment."

"Where do you go?"

"I have to check something – so we can be sure if he really ran away."

David went down the stairs and seemed to search for something in the living room. Then she could hear him curse loudly, that loud it was still audible upstairs, and he ran back upstairs.

"What are you so mad about? What were you searching for?"

"Our cash-box... The money – it is gone, he has stolen from us. He has taken the money!"

"So he really ran away. He took his clothes, his personel things and the money and he ran away!"

"I think we should call the police..."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

The FBI's missing persons unit had been called by the local police after the Matthews had reported Joaquin's disappearance and Jack had ordered his co-workers to meet at the office.

He had talked to the detective in charge already, who had given the basic information to him. Right now he was recalling this information to the team.

"Joaquin Matthews, 17 years of age. He was in a fight with his foster parents yesterday night, when he came home late. They were arguing and he finally left the scene and locked himself in his private room. When his mother wanted to talk to him this morning, she found some of his clothes and personal things gone and the room's window open. Looks like he ran away."

"You have been talking to the parents already?"

Yes I did."

"So, what did they say about their foster son and his disappearance?"

Flashback

The Matthew family had their house at a suburb of N.Y.C. It was one of these two staged small, uni painted apartment houses, that looked like all the others around them. Not even the slightest sign of individuality. It was a housing in an area that once – probably at the end of the eighties – had been part of these huge programs, that would lodge people out of the city, forcing them to take - at least – a half an hour drive every day, to get to their offices. There were thousands of equal houses around the city of New York and there was nothing special about this one. Except for the fact that it just became the scene of an investigation this morning.

Police had informed the Matthews he would pay them a visit later that day. So when he rang the bell, he wasn't surprised that the door was opened up almost immediately. They probably had been tensed all day, since they knew that he would come down here to interview them. He could imagine Mrs. Matthews – who had opened up on him – standing behind the door, waiting for him to finally arrive. The tension the foster parents felt, was almost comprehensible, as was their fear. He was greeted by both of them, guided to the living room and asked to sit down.

After holding the emotions and the fear back for all the time they had been forced to wait, Mrs. Matthews finally let them out in an outburst.

"I just can't believe this! I mean – I knew things weren't perfect between us, but I thought he was getting along. That it was just a phase and that he would get over it sooner or later. I never believed he was so deeply troubled so discontent about our relationship, that he would actually run from us. I don't know where we went wrong..."

"You shouldn't be blaming yourself. We don't even know which reasons he had to run away. It's possible, that he has been troubled about something completely different. We don't know yet. That's why I'm here – I would like to find out a bit about Joaquin."

"What would you like to know?"

"You said that the situation between you and him wasn't perfect – why's that?"

"I can't exactly tell you what caused it, but from one day to another he started to fight with us. He was arguing about things there had been no discussion about before, he was disobeying to the rules and he would deliberately hurt us with what he was saying."

"For example?"

"Well, it was always the same stuff. That we had no right to restrain him, that he didn't need us and that we never could take the part of real parents for him. He told us one over the other time that we weren't his real, corporal parents no matter how hard we tried and that we would never be."

"And this happened all of a sudden?"

"Yeah, pretty much. It's not like he was always smiling and calling us Mom and Dad before, but he got along with us. We had put up some rules and he wouldn't break them. He wasn't rude and he wasn't disobeying..."

"You got any idea what caused the change in his behavior?"

"I honestly don't know."

"Any trouble with friends or at school?"

"Joaquin doesn't really have a lot of friends... But there was a situation in school – his class-teacher called us about a week ago and informed us that Joaquin had to be taken to nursery. He was in a fight with a boy from his class. The teacher also told us that Joaquin's marks had dropped and that he had missed school several times. He wanted us to come over and have a talk with him – that would've been tomorrow."

"You talked to Joaquin about it?"

"We tried to. we asked him to tell us what was wrong with him and if we could help him, but he wouldn't even listen to us. Everything we got for an answer were insults and finally he left for his private room and wouldn't even say a single word for the next two days..."

"What about a girlfriend?"

"As far as I know, he doesn't have a girlfriend. I never saw him with a girl – not here and not at school."

"Anything else that occurred strange to you – anything he had done or said?"

"No – I'm sorry. The only disturbing thing was his sudden change."

"Alright – thank you for the moment. I'll keep you posted and I'll inform you as soon as we find out anything about Joaquin's current residence."

"Thank you."

They rose and he was guided to the door by Mr. Matthews, who gave him a desperate look before he left.

"You'll find him, won't you?"

It was such a heart braking, desperate question filled with tension, fear and anxiety, but also hope. Jack didn't want to disturb the Matthews even more.

"We will do our best in finding him."

End of flashback

"What's the timeframe?"

"He came home at about three in the morning and his mother checked his room at nine a.m – he disappeared somewhere in between. It's 1 p.m. now – that would set a time of 10 hours missing at maximum."

"So that means he could have gone anywhere right now – time enough he had."

"Exactly – let's get it started then. Sam, Danny – I want you to get to the boy's school. Talk to his class-teacher. Maybe there had been any unusual things occurring in the past few weeks concerning Joaquin Matthews.

Martin, Viv – I want you two to talk to Joaquin's social-worker. The Matthews already called her and she will be awaiting you. I'm gonna talk to immigration. Any more questions?"

As he had expected, there were none. They left the office into different directions and Jack got back to his private office to call the agent in charge on Joaquin's case at immigration.


	4. Chapter 4

A.N.: The following chapter is a flashback to Danny's past. I didn't want to proclaim this in

the previous chapter, for it is supposed to interrupt the main storyline – as a

sudden unwanted memory would do, as well.

Hope you like it, please RR.

Chapter 4:

She knew this meeting she was about to have would be hard, it was a difficult task and it wasn't the first time she had to do this. The Stevensons had called her and wanted to meet her as soon as possible. Michael Stevenson had sounded furious, desperate and exhausted. Something must've gone wrong when he sounded like this, deeply wrong – once again. The Stevensons were friendly, respectable and understanding people. They had been guiding children through their difficult youth as foster parents for years now and she couldn't realize to ever have experienced Michael like this – so close to giving up on one of the children he had taken custody of. There had been hard times before, but never like this. Especially when she took into consideration that this wasn't the first time the Stevensons had called in, but she always had been able to convince them to keep on trying. She wasn't sure she would manage to do this once again.

She rose from her desk, crossed the room and opened the door to her office at youth felware to greet the Stevensons, who probably were already waiting in front of her office. She frowned by the sight of the people at the floor. The Stevensons were there, but they hadn't come alone. They had her problem-child with them, the one teenager really giving her a hard time in believing she was doing the right thing and frequently causing her trouble in any way possible. She knew she never would give up onto one of the kids she was supposed to take care of, but sometimes she was close to rather losing her temper or her hope. And Daniel Alvarez had been the one teenager that had changed this sometimes into a rather often - lately.

He was sitting opposite to his foster parents and was ignoring them at his best by not saying a word and not even having a look at them. His face stated pure indifference and the feeling of not having done anything wrong. The Stevensons on the other hand looked somehow unhappy – like they bitterly had realized there was nothing more they could do. She just hoped she could clear the situation and make them take Daniel home with them once again, because she was deeply afraid they wouldn't be willing to.

"Michael. Ruth."

She was giving them a hand and a friendly smile.

"Julie – it's very nice you could spare some time for us so soon."

"No problem..."

She turned to Daniel and gave another smile to him, but she didn't receive a reaction.

"Hi, Daniel."

He gave her a slight look, full of annoyance.

"Hey."

Was all she received as an answer before he turned away from her again. She could sense an uneasy feeling rise in her and take her over – now she knew there was something wrong. She was pretty sure the Stevensons had to cope with this kind of behavior since weeks, if not even months. She could pretty much understand why they wished to talk to her and she wasn't really averse to tell them they were right with being furious and desperate. But this wasn't about the Stevensons, they weren't the ones she had to take care of. She had to make sure she was achieving what was the best for Daniel and she had to try to manage that, even if it meant to convince the Stevensons to abandon their wish of giving up. She wasn't allowed to give up on her´ kids – that was her job.

"Would you like to come in?"

"Yeah sure, thanks Julie."

Daniel stayed seated when the Stevensons entered her office and they didn't make any effort to force him to follow them. Julie frowned once again. She had believed they had taken Daniel with them so they could talk about their problems all together. Because normally the foster families didn't take their children in custody with them if they came for a meeting at youth welfare. They – normally - stayed at home. The only exception were grave problems that had to be talked about with the children, so they got a chance to express where their problem was. But the Stevensons didn't seem to want Daniel to join them, so Julie didn't really get why he was here with them. She addressed Daniel once again.

"Don't you wanna join us?"

This time he didn't even look at her.

"No."

She still wasn't getting what this was all about, but she didn't wanna dig deeper. Daniel obviously wasn't willing to talk to her. She would ask Ruth and Michael when she would be alone with them in her office. She nodded and closed the door behind her. After the Stevensons had sat down, she asked what was her most urgent question.

"Why did you take him with you?"

Ruth was the first to answer, she looked extremely uneasy by her question and not clearly certain about what to say.

"That's a bit difficult..."

Michael interrupted her. Julie could see the anger on his face as he directly headed to the point of this conversation without taking any further notice of her question.

"He can't stay, Julie. As much as we would like, but he can't..."

Julie sighed soundlessly, this was more grave then she had imagined. She wasn't even sure how Daniel would have managed to drive Michael Stevenson – the perfect father as she playfully called him - that far to literally throw him out. Ruth interrupted him and finally answered her question.

"Michael, please – calm yourself. I think we should explain our problems first and talk about it."

She gave her husband a look of sympathy and he nodded to her proposal. Then she addressed Julie.

"To answer your question: we were afraid he wouldn't be still at home when we came back, so we had to take him with us."

"Not at home?"

Julie wasn't completely sure what Ruth wanted to tell her, but she had an alarming suspicion.

Michael answered her question, still having an angry tone in his voice.

"Exactly: not at home, gone. He already tried to run away. Police brought him back home yesterday evening..."

This time Julie sighed loudly – this was really worse than she had ever imagined. But maybe there had been a reason.

"Did you have a fight?"

Desperation could be seen in Ruth's eyes.

"Actually, we're constantly fighting since about three weeks. It really became unbearable since that day. But that's not it. We were constantly having trouble with Daniel and the situation decreased more and more."

"Would you explain this, please – I mean I know the kids are difficult sometimes, but..."

"Difficult isn't the right word Julie – it's not even close to what we were experiencing lately."

Julie gave them an inviting look and Ruth began to explain.

"He wouldn't talk to us, he wouldn't listen to us. He's out all night without telling us where he goes, he's staying up late, he's in his room all day playing loud music and not caring if we tell him not to, he doesn't have diner with us, he won't join us in the daily tasks considering the household..."

Julie interrupted them. To her this all didn't seem to be so unnatural at all. Troubles like this normally were occuring, even in families with corporal parents who had teenage children. This wasn't unusual, it was not even a big problem after all.

"I'm sorry, but I don't see a problem here..."

Michael took a chance to go on.

"That's not all. He is out for clubs or parties he legally isn't allowed to be, he's drinking, he skips school frequently, he won't do his homework..."

"He's a teenager..."

"We know that, but that doesn't give him the right to behave like this. Because that still isn't it. He's disrespecting us – you don't wanna know what we had to listen to lately. He told us we had no right to demand anything for we weren't his parents. We had to listen to many offences, from anything: of being unfair and old-fashioned up to being the most contemptible people he ever met. He made Ruth cry and he didn't even care about it. He told us he doesn't care about our disciplinaries and that he cannot understand how we ever managed to be allowed to take custody of other children. Sometimes we haven't seen him for several days until he finally came home with the words that he would like some diner and that we had no right to ask him where he had been. He would keep us up all night with TV and music and he was doing it intentionally. He doesn't give us entrance to his room, because we have no right to disturb his privacy. I believe he had been taking the car for driving with some friends without permission, too. He isn't even allowed to drive without an adult by his side! And I believe, no I'm pretty sure about this and it makes me so sad – I just don't know what we did wrong..., he was stealing from us, stealing money..."

Julie didn't know what to say about this. Telling them they should try once again was the last thing she could give as an advice, although that was what she was supposed to do. But this was bad, it was really bad.

"Did you try to talk to him?"

"We tried to talk to him, we tried to sentence him, we tried to ignore the problems – we tried anything possible. We were forbidding him to go out, to watch TV, to see friends, to call them. We were not talking to him for days, we were trying to ignore his demands. We were having discussions and fights with each other and we were trying to show sympathy. We asked him about his problems and his sorrows, we asked him what was wrong and what we could change to improve the situation. We told him about our feelings, we told him what we wanted him to do. We really tried everything. But it was of no use – he wouldn't listen to us, he wouldn't talk to us, he wouldn't do what we say and would just ignore our prohibitions. He didn't care about it – he just didn't care. Honestly – I don't know what to do. He's the fourth child we're trying to guide to maturity and I have no idea what we could do to get along, I have not even the slightest idea."

"I fully understand this, but..."

"Julie, we really tried hard. And it became even worse in the last few weeks."

Julie swallowed hard. She believed she already had heard the worst part of this.

"We haven't heard a single word from him in the past three weeks. He hasn't been home for about four days the first week just leaving a message he was with a friend, and he has been with some boys almost all night for the other two, not coming home before six in the morning. He hasn't been to school for the past three weeks, although they were doing exams then. We didn't even know that – his teacher called us and asked why he hadn't been there for exam. He probably has to do the year once again. He has been smoking, in the house, right in front of our eyes – although he knows Michael is asthmatic. He had taken the car once again – several times, just leaving a message he would be back soon until Michael finally hid the keys. He hasn't obeyed to any demand or prohibition we banned him to. And he stopped talking to us, I mean it's not like he has been talking to us much ever, but we don't even have him talking the same language with us. He was only speaking spanish, even writing his damn – excuse me - notes in spanish just to disrespect us.

Two days ago, Michael missed to hide the carkeys and the boy took them and some of our money and came back the next morning at about eight, missing his last exam before summer break. That finally exceeded the limit and Michael lost his temper on him; they were having a heated argument and Daniel was that carefree and respectless, Michael..."

"What did you do?"

Julie was pretty sure what they wanted to tell her, what was so hard for them to tell her, what made them feel so ashamed and sad to tell her and she was so sorry for them because she knew they would never forgive it to themselves. Michael was very quiet and didn't look at her when he answered.

"I hit him – right in the face."

Now he was looking at her and she could see the desperation in his eyes.

"I...I didn't mean to. You know that, I wouldn't do this, I never thought I would even be capable of doing this. But I, I was so furious, so mad at him and he was constantly talking against me, disrespecting me... I just didn't know what to do anymore, I just lost my temper completely and stopped thinking. I..."

"Michael, it's okay. I know you made a mistake and I know you didn't mean to. I don't blame you... So that's when he ran away."

"Yes. That night he left. He had his whole stuff taken with him and he just left..."

"Julie – you have to take him back here. You have to send him to another family. I mean even if he would realize we weren't that bad one day and we would get along better, though I gave up hope this will happen. But he could never trust us – never. Michael hurt him – how could he ever trust us again."

Julie kept silent for some more moments. It was difficult to give advice to them.

"I know this is a hard time for you and I believe it had been a difficult decision. I know you are one of the best foster parents I've ever experienced. You have coped with some children by now and with a lot of – rather difficult – problems and you managed to get them through. All of them. I know Daniel is a problem-kid and I know he has a lot of pride, self-assurance and temper. But I believe all of his behavior was just up to finally making you give up. That's what he wanted. He wanted to show you and me, that he wouldn't ever accept my decision to send him to a foster family and that nobody would get along with him. He wants to come back. He wants me to let him live his life all on his own, with all the liberties he was allowed to have under the custody of his brother. Just that he doesn't realize he's too young to live on his own. I know this is much, but I ask you none the less. Take as much time as you need, but think about trying it once again. If you give up now, he has achieved his goal and that would make it even harder to find a new family for him. I know he didn't give you any hints that point to that, but don't give up on him. He will realize he's wrong. All you have to do is keeping your faith in him."

"You're right – that's really much, you want us to do."

"It's for Daniel's best. Please don't take this as an offence, but you know where some of our kids finally end up if they don't receive the proper guidance. I don't want this to happen to Daniel and I don't think you want it either..."

They didn't answer her, but she could see that at last Ruth was willing to try. She could see it in her face. Michael on the other hand seemed doubtful. He still was blaming himself for hurting the boy and maybe he was afraid it could happen again. But she knew Michael Stevenson – he wouldn't give up on his foster child. And he would listen to his wife.

"Alright Julie, we will think about it."

"Thank you."

She smiled at them, rose and gave them a hand. She led them to the door and gave her farewell to them. After the door had closed behind them, she sighed out loudly and fell back to her chair. This had been one of the worst conversations she ever had with foster parents and it had been the worst talk she ever had with the Stevensons. She felt so sorry for them. They were such lovely people and they deserved better than this. They didn't deserve to be treated like this. Just that Daniel didn't seem to realize it. She had known he would give them a hard time, but she had been positive the Stevensons could cope with that and finally would manage that Daniel would trust them and give up his stupid behavior. Obviously she had been wrong. She just hoped the Stevensons would give it another try. Deep in his heart – beneath all the rejection and disrespect, Daniel was a good boy. The Stevensons just had to find this boy inside of him. She hoped they would try to manage this task – for Daniel's sake.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

The high school building in downtown Brooklyn, about half an hour away from the Matthew's house in the suburbs of New York, was an old brick wall housing, probably from the 40th or 50th of the last century. It has nothing of the charm of some other older buildings in downtown New York – it was an old, gray, functional building, that was in desperate need of some renovation, but as the city was lacking of money – it probably would never happen.

It was one of this average, national schools middle class family send their children to, knowing it wasn't the best thing for them but still in hope the outer appearance of the school didn't tell anything about the quality of the teachers. Most parents didn't like to send their children to such schools – old, dirty and on the edge of being closed due to security lacks – but they couldn't effort a private school and they were hoping for their children to get past this time of their life and achieve something better as soon as they started college.

Just that these schools weren't meant to set the basis for college. They guided their pupils through their teenage years and formed average, middle class adults that once would have a hard eight hour working routine in a job they didn't like. Hopes and dreams were nothing of a use at a place like this. And that was what the whole building expressed to the one seeing and especially to the one entering it.

Right now it were Sam and Danny, who were entering the building to talk to Joaquins' teachers. As his foster parents had managed that their had been difficulties, maybe they could precisely tell them what Joaquin had done or hadn't done that caused his trouble. The principal – a white, overweight man in his 50th with a serious and strict appearance, welcomed them at the building's front entrance. Mrs. Matthews had called the school and had informed them about Joaquin's disappearance so the principal had already been informed about their coming. He gave them a hand and introduced himself.

"I'm Timothy Steven Winters – the principal of this school. You're from FBI?"

"Yes, this is agent Taylor, I'm agent Spade. We're here to..."

"Joaquin Matthews – I know."

Sam frowned when he interrupted her. The principal seemed to be a pretty self-assured character. She was almost willing to call him arrogant... and pretty rude. Normally one would give the person he was talking to the chance to finish the introduction to the theme of the conversation.

"Exactly. Have their been any problems with him lately?"

"Any? Joaquin Matthews has been a frequent guest in my office in the past few weeks."

Sam already started to get annoyed about this guy. She didn't like the way he was talking to her, the way he was expressing his opinion and the way he tried to keep head of this conversation. He didn't seem to get that this was a questioning and he was supposed to help them, not to set himself into the brightest light possible. Fortunately Danny went on questioning him, now.

"So, why's that?"

"A couple of things: he has been skipping school several times in the past two month, he didn't do his homework, he was too late, he missed a test in biology and geography, he had an argument with his class teacher – a pretty heated one - and he was having some fights with other students. He had been very arrogant and stubborn, not willing to listen and obey to the authorities taking care of him. I was having several talks with him, telling him he needed to stop behaving like this or I would be forced to throw him out. He was having a few disciplinarians from his teachers and from me, but obviously it didn't help that much. His behavior didn't change, so I had to give him a week of detention..."

"You threw him out?"

"No, I didn't throw him out – I just banned him from the school area for a certain time. That's

why it's called a detention."

Sam still kept quiet, but she didn't like the way the principal was behaving towards her co-worker. He seemed even more rude and arrogant now. This was slowly getting pretty nasty...

"Thanks for the explanation, Mr. Winters. There's something else I would like to know: doesn't this school have a psychologist or a teacher taking care of the pupils' worries?"

"Of course we have. We have a school's psychologist – that would be Mrs. Hannah Lynden. She studied psychology in Princeton and graduated as third best of her year. I would say that makes a proper psychologist – don't you think?"

"Yeah definitely. So, if you have a school's psychologist and Joaquin Matthews was having trouble, wouldn't it have been normal school policy to send him to the psychologist to talk to her. You know – as a measure of security. To sort out if he was having severe problems or if he maybe was a danger to the school or to himself?"

The principal laughed hard, when Danny had finished his question.

"Joaquin Matthews didn't need a psychologist. What he needed was discipline... He wasn't having troubles, he was behaving like this because he liked to and because his parents weren't able to stop him doing it. He was just too proud, stubborn and tempered to do the right thing. It's a more,..., biological problem, it's in the blood, the genes. I know his sort of people – a heated temper seems to be a natural problem..."

Sam absolutely disliked the look the principal shot at Danny while he was saying this. She was pretty sure what he meant, what his problem was. He was having prejudices and that had made him lose his objection on Joaquin Matthews and his troubled situation. The only problem occurring now was, that Danny seemed to have understood the principals hidden aggression, discrimination and contempt too and he started losing his temper to that guy. The situation was getting heated more and more. They needed to take the tension out of it. But before she was able to try, Danny had already addressed the principal once again in a trembling voice.

"His sort of people?"

Before the situation was finally escalating, Sam took the conversation once again. He didn't want the principal to answer – he wouldn't be more careful, although he knew Danny was angry about him. But the principal was extremely self-assured and as he believed temper was a natural problem, Sam was pretty sure, he halfway expected Danny to attack him – verbally or even physically.

"Did he have any friends or a girlfriend?"

"This school accommodates 647 pupils in 25 classes, Mrs. Spade. I don't know about every pupils favorite teacher, class or cafeteria food. And I don't know about their friends. I'm sorry."

"Is there anyone who could help us with that?"

"You should talk to his class teacher, Mr. Roth, I believe he can help you with that."

"Where do we find him?"

"His last class ended about 15 minutes ago, but he probably still is in the room. That's class

room 24, third left on the second floor."

"Thanks, Mr. Winters."

"No problem. If there is anything else I can help you with, I'll be at my office."

He gave them a faked, friendly smile, turned around and left. He was just around the corner and out of their sight, when Sam could hear a repetition of her co-worker's earlier question.

"His sort of people?"

She could see the expression of anger on his face and she gave him a look of empathy.

"Don't even start with it. It's of no use. Being angry about his behavior won't help it!"

"Where did he take the audacity to talk to us like this? I mean it's not just that he has been

openly unfriendly. But he behaved like he was talking to children. Who does he think he is? Does he really believe – just because he's the principal of a middle-class school, he has the right to treat us like that?"

"Would you calm down now! You won't ever have to talk to him again – so stop arguing with me. I know his behavior wasn't okay..."

"It's not his behavior towards us that troubles me. It's the fact that he treated Joaquin Matthews the same way. He didn't care for the kids' troubles and know he's gone. Don't you think he had a certain responsibility for this kid?"

"So – you wanna blame him for Joaquin running away?"

"If he would be the principal of my school. I think it would at last be a point for running away."

"You heard him – Joaquin was a stubborn and proud teenager. Do you really believe he would have given his principal the satisfaction he feels right now, that the boy ran away? I think there's a much more deeper reason."

"Let's find out if the teacher knows about any deeper reason and lets hope he's a more understanding and accessible character."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

They crossed the floor, went up the stairs and entered the second floor. The classroom door was open and there was no sound coming from inside. They entered the classroom and spotted a tall, slim, dark haired man in the beginning 30th packing his briefcase.

"Mr. Roth?"

"Yeah, that's me. And you are?"

"Agent Spade and agent Taylor. FBI."

"FBI? What can I do for you?"

"We need you to tell us about Joaquin Matthews."

"Joaquin? Is he in any trouble?"

"We don't know yet. He's missing."

"And you're trying to find him?"

"Exactly – so what can you tell us about him."

"Joaquin – well... The boy was, lets say, difficult to handle in the past few weeks..."

"The principal told us, you had an argument with him and that he had some fights with other students?"

"Yeah that's true. I was asking him to tell me what was wrong with him, but he didn't want to. He was telling me it was none of my business and that I should keep out of it. He was pretty rude,..., and loud."

"So he was having trouble?"

"Severe trouble, but he didn't talk to anyone."

"What about the school's psychologist..."

Sam didn't get to finish her question for Danny was interrupting her.

"Well, the principal told us he wasn't having problems and that he didn't need the aid of a psychologist."

"The principal – is an old-fashioned, superstitious idiot. Excuse the expression. He is arrogant, he is a racist and he loves to hear himself talk. He has no idea about his pupils problems. Joaquin Matthews was a troubled kid, but the principal either didn't want to see it or he didn't care. That's due to the boys ethnicity."

It was Joaquin's teacher, who shot a look at Danny this time, but it was of a completely

different kind.

"I guess you already experienced it. But I guess Joaquin was deeply troubled about himself. He was trying to figure out, who he was and where he belonged to. You probably know the Matthews aren't his real parents and he was deeply worried about what kind of a person he was. I mean he grew up with two completely different ethnicities and ways of living. He needed to find out about his true identity and that was difficult for him. He would have been in desperate need of the school's psychologist's advice and I had wanted the principal to send him there, but he didn't. On the other hand – I don't think Joaquin would have talked to her. He didn't trust her and he would've wanted to sort out his troubles on his own."

"Do you believe he was depressive...?"

"You mean if he wanted to kill himself? No! I don't believe that. He was troubled and he was

angry, but he wasn't suicidal. He just needed time to find himself..."

"We're currently searching for people he may have gone to. Friends or a girlfriend?"

"He didn't really have friends, I believe. I mean there were a couple of people he was hanging around with during breaks and he probably saw them from time to time after school. They were buddies, but real close friends? No, I don't think so. But he had a girlfriend: Sara Peréz. At last I believe she was his girlfriend – they behaved like a couple. But that's not very long ago – probably only a couple of weeks. But he seemed to really care for her..."

"You have her address?"

"Yeah – she just moved here some month ago – I believe she lives in Spanish Harlem with

her family. I think I got her address somewhere in here."

He opened his briefcase once again and started to search for the address.

"What can you tell us about her."

"Sara? She's 15 years old and she's a pretty smart girl, but shy, very shy. She seems to have trouble with getting along in bigger groups, finding friend, talking to people she doesn't know – stuff like that. But she's a very lovely and caring young girl... Here it is!"

He fetched the address from his briefcase and handed it to Sam.

"What about the opposite side, any kids he was having a lot of trouble with?"

"There are some kids he was constantly fighting with. The Connor's brothers were his biggest

problem. You know, they come from a wealthy family and they have their own apartment in downtown Manhattan, but they have been thrown out of every elite private school on this side of the country and as their parents didn't wanna move to the pacific, they were sent to a national school. Their father is paying an amount of money every month, so the principal doesn't throw them out. Of course the school itself doesn't see any of it – I believe Winters keeps it all for himself. To have some nice last years on the Florida Keys when he retires or something."

"What were they fighting about?"

"The Connor's were making fun of him from time to time, because of his familiar background, his living conditions and because of his ethnicity. Normally he just wouldn't listen to it – he didn't care. But lately he shot back – verbally at first and then since the last two weeks also physically..."

"So he was hurt in his pride?"

"Yeah I guess so. You know it's not he hates them or vice versa – it's just that – considering the fact he was in search of an identity of his own – this had been pretty hard and insulting for him. So he fought back."

"Alright – is there anything else?"

"Yeah – there is Miguel Luis of course."

"Of course?"

"I'm sorry – if you would know the situation, you would understand the choice of words. Miguel is a very,..., self-assured kid, he's used to being liked by everyone and he's used to get what he wants. He's captain of the school's football team and he is the most popular guy in the whole school, I believe – all the boys wish to be his buddy and all the girls wish for him to choose her as his girlfriend. Unfortunately, his newest point of interest was Sara."

"But Sara wasn't interested..."

"Exactly. And she told him so. But when Miguel found out that Sara was with Joaquin – he went completely mad. He just lost his temper like I've never seen it before. I mean I've seen this boy angry before, but not like that. He was so goddamn furious, I was afraid he would kill the boy. He felt disrespect in his honor and dignity and he blamed Joaquin for this. He went to him and called Sara a stupid bitch, that he wouldn't even consider worth having sex with, if she would pay him for doing it, and he told him Joaquin probably was the right choice – he was as stupid and contemptible as her."

"So they were fighting?"

"Yeah – I mean they were really fighting – I had to send both of them to nursery afterwards. And that was what also made me believe Joaquin cared for Sara really deeply. I mean you probably have seen pictures of him, he's not that strong. Miguel Luis is about 6 feet tall and he's pretty musculous – he's a football player. I mean Joaquin had no chance against him and he knew it, but he tried to protect Sara's honor none the less – like a noble gentleman."

"Maybe you should give us the address of Miguel Luis, too..."


	7. Chapter 7

A.N.: First of all – thanks for all your wonderful reviews, I'm so grateful for every kind of feedback I get...

Here's yet another flashback for you. Hope you enjoy it.

Please RR.

Chapter 7:

"Daniel Alvarez!"

The young boy winced by his mother's words and shot his elder brother a helpless look. But all he received from him was a smirking grin.

"Man, now you're in deep trouble."

"But I..."

His brother interrupted him before he even had a chance to explain.

"Stop! Save that for Mom and spare me with any details – I don't wanna know. Oh,..., and if it should be about me even in the slightest way..."

"I know, I know. You didn't do anything wrong and even if, I don't know anything about it."

"Good boy. And don't you dare to tell her something different. Believe me – you would regret it. Understood?"

He had known it before, had known his brother wouldn't help him, wouldn't protect him from his mother – but he was disappointed none the less. He was his elder brother for heaven's sake – it was his task to help him out.

"Okay."

"Say it..."

Anger was welling up inside him. Not enough he wouldn't protect him, now he was playing with him too. He shot him an angry almost hateful look and immediately saw the expression on his brother's face get harder. It was of no use: he was older, taller and had more strength. Fighting with him – he would definitely loose.

"Understood."

"Fine. Hurry now, you don't want to make mommy even more furious then she already is by letting her wait."

He turned from his brother and ran to the backdoor, that leaded to the small yard behind the house, and entered the kitchen. His mother was leaning against the kitchen table, arms crossed before her chest and red spots on her face. She was absolutely furious and he had no idea why. He hadn't done anything wrong – at last nothing of which she would know. Except for...- but she couldn't know about this, he had been careful.

"Where have you been this morning?"

She knew it. But he tried none the less.

"In school?"

She almost jumped from the place at the kitchen table and was close to him not even a second later. The red marks on her face got bigger and more colored.

"Don't you dare lying to me!"

He winced by her screamed words and her high voice.

"Your teacher called me and asked me if you were still feeling sick or would be back in school tomorrow. Well, I had to tell him I didn't even know you were sick and that you left for school as usual! How do you think I was feeling when I had to tell your teacher, I – your own mother – didn't know where you were? You were lying to me and you were also lying to your teacher! What the hell makes you act like a complete idiot? So stop telling me lies and tell me where you have been!"

"I...I can't, I promised."

"Did I miss something? I'm your mother – you forgot that? Believe me – you can tell me or

I'll force you to!"

Seeing her raging expression, her clenched wrists, her sparkling eyes and her small lips – she didn't look as beautiful as she normally did. And she looked older and tensed. She looked unhappy and that was the last thing he wanted. She was his mother – she was supposed to feel proud and happy about her children. Seeing her like this made him feel sad and sorry. He bowed his head and lowered his voice.

"I've been downtown – with a couple of friends of mine..."

Silence fell between the two of them as his mother stepped back and sat down at the kitchen table after her son's confession.

"I'm sorry Mom."

"No boy – you're not. You're not sorry about skipping school and rather spend your time hanging round downtown with some friends. You're sorry that I found out about it and that you'll be sentenced for what you did."

"I didn't wanna disappoint you..."

A little spark of sympathy was in her face when she looked at him. Besides the sadness in her eyes.

"Why did you do it then? Good lord – Daniel, this is no joke! This is your only chance to create a basis that will allow you to have a better future. A better life than we live right now. I know you dislike going to school – every child does and I know thinking about the wider consequences and study to have chances in later life, is very less fun than being out with your friends – now, in present. But you only have this one chance. This time won't ever come again, you can't decide once again. You have to do it now. It's the only chance you'll have and it'll dictate your whole future. Your father is working the whole day in a badly paid job to earn enough money to feed his family. He will have to do this job for the rest of his life, working hard, being paid low and achieving nothing. And with your brother it's no better. Do you think they like their jobs? Do you think they enjoy the limitations life put on them? I don't wanna sentence you – I want you to have a chance, want you to achieve something. This is for your own best – your own sake. I just want you to be happy in life."

He just nodded silently without saying a word. His mom had gotten sentimental and had held her improve the future´ speech. He hated when she did that. She was so eager to form a better life for her children. He had heard this speech once too often. He was ten years old and he was supposed to have fun. It was his childhood! There was still enough time left to think about his future plans. But if it made her happy, he would listen to her speech over and over again.

"Okay Mom."

"You'll stay at home for the rest of the week and for the next weekend. And I'll talk to your father when he comes home tonight."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8:

When his father came home that night, Danny was already asleep. He had skipped diner, for he didn't wanna have to look at his mother's sad and worried face once again tonight and had gone to bed early. He had been thinking about the next few days. Probably the most boring days of the whole summer, just going to school in the morning and sitting around at home under the watchful eyes of his mother in the afternoon and she had grounded him for the weekend too. He wouldn't be allowed to go downtown or to the beach or see his friends. He would be home all alone while the sun was shining outside and his friends were playing outside there and having fun without him. It just wasn't fair. He knew skipping school hadn't been a good idea, but having to stay at home for the next five days and the next weekend was too hard. It really wasn't fair. He knew his brother Rafael was missing school all the time and even Erika did sometimes. Well - she did it to be at her working place in time and make some money, but she did. And the two never had to stay at home for a week without seeing their friends. But he also knew being angry about it was of no use – his mother had made her decision and there was nothing he could do to change it. He just hoped his father was in a good mood tonight when he came home and didn't get too angry about his behavior. He didn't want to be the reason for his parents fighting. Maybe he at least wouldn't hear it... He closed his eyes and tried to relax and about twenty minutes later he had fallen asleep.

"He has...? Would you please repeat that!"

His mother's answer couldn't be heard.

"I'm working nine hours a day, leaving this godforsaken house at six in the morning and not coming back before it's dark. I don't see my wife, I don't see my children. I'm working my ass off just to effort a little bit of financial security for this family. I'm working to feed my children and what do I get as a thank you? Didn't we teach our children to respect their parents? Didn't we make clear that they don't get everything they have for free

– that they have to take over responsibility? The only thing I want from all of them is that they do what they are supposed to, what is best for them. I want a little bit of payback for everything I'm doing for all of you. And now you tell me my son isn't even able to go to school? But takes some time off, skipping school, hanging round downtown, lying to us and scaring us half to death by just leaving without a word? Is that what you wanna tell me."

He had woken up, had heard his father talking, his loud, furious voice, his angry questions to his mother and he was afraid – he was scared for his father coming upstairs. He was afraid of what he would say to him and he was even more afraid of what he would do...

"I don't want to calm down and I don't give a shit if they're already sleeping! This is my house – I can do whatever I want to. So don't you tell me what to do! And now I'm going to have a conversation with my son."

Danny knew his Mom tried to stop him, she tried to be careful, she tried to talk him into calming down and she tried to soothe him, so he wouldn't get too angry, but it hadn't worked. His father had had a long, bad day of working and he wished to be left in peace when he came home. But now he had to cope with his son's mistake and that was the last thing he wanted to do tonight. Danny just wished to be somewhere else, wished to disappear to some different place – but he knew it wouldn't happen. He had tried over and over again, prayed for it, wished for it, hoped for it. But finally he realized that things like this only happened in fairytales and this was reality. He could hear his father storming up the stairs and he knew he would be here in a few seconds...

From the corner of his eyes Danny saw a movement beside him, he winced due to the irrational feeling of his father already being here. But he was wrong, it was Rafael – he got up from bed, turned around and kneeled down beside his bed.

"Danny?"

"Yeah."

"Whatever you hear – don't you say a word and don't you move from this bed. Do you understand me?"

"Yeah..."

His brother gave him a slight smile and a questioning look.

"Understood."

"Good boy – don't you worry. Everything's gonna be okay."

"But dad..."

"Shh, what did I just tell you?"

"Keep quiet."

"Exactly. Do it than – don't disappoint me."

Rafael rose and quickly headed to the door, opened it, stepped outside and closed it behind him just in time. Their father had just arrived upstairs and was about to enter their bedroom.

"Hey dad."

"Get out of my way Rafael! Now!"

"Why? What do you wanna do?"

"Who the hell do you think you are, questioning my motivation. I'm your father – I don't need to explain anything to you. So, you show respect now and get out of the way!"

"No dad."

"How dare... You're disrespecting me? I'll show you what happens if you do that."

"Dad, please... I don't want to disrespect you. I just want you to stay calm. There's nothing wrong."

"Shut the hell up! It's up to me to decide if there's anything wrong and now you get away or I'll force you to."

"Dad, don't you do this, he's already asleep, don't wake him up. He has to get up early for school tomorrow, just let him rest."

"I don't give a damn if he's already sleeping. I will talk to him now. And I don't care if he has to get up early tomorrow. He skipped school today, so why do you care about him getting up tomorrow."

"Dad – I beg you. I know he has made a mistake, but..."

"Don't you dare talking to me like this. Who do you think you are? You're not his father, you have no right to decide if he was wrong with something he did. Any you definitely have no right to decide how to cope with his mistakes! I'm his father and I'm gonna give him a talk and something more to think about..."

"Dad – he's just a child, he just wanted to have some fun. And now he's asleep. He already received his sentence by mom and he's really sorry about what he did."

"Stop arguing with me – Rafael Alvarez! I'm not interested in your opinion and I don't care! Now leave!"

"No, dad – I won't let you inside here. He's just a boy, he can't protect himself from your anger."

"Protection? He doesn't need protection - this is discipline!"

"Yeah and I know you have a lot of fun in disciplining your kids!"

"How could you... Don't you dare to talk to me like this, you goddamn, little, unthankful bastard. I'll show you how much fun it is!"

Danny could hear a smacking sound behind the closed bedroom door and then he could hear Rafael's deep breathing. He clenched his fingers into the sheets of the bed and turned away from the door. He didn't wanna hear this, couldn't hear it any more. But it happened again and once again and again. Now Rafael was screaming in pain. But his dad didn't stop, he could hear it, could still hear him. Steps were flying up the stairs and his mother's shrill voice was ringing in his ears.

"Darling stop it! Stop hurting him. Honey please – stop it! Leave him, leave the boy! Please!"

He could literally see her hanging at his father's arms and trying to protect her teenage child. Trying to soothe him with her words and making him stop hitting his child, stop hurting him. And as he couldn't hear anything any more, she probably managed it.

"Hope you learned your lesson boy. You go to bed now. And don't you dare to get in my way ever again!"

He could hear his fathers' steps as he was walking away and the calm soothing voice his mother, who was still talking to him. Danny had hidden beneath the blanket by now and started crying. Rafael had protected him, he had done a lot for him. He had helped him out of the situation. He had taken the beating Danny was supposed to get from his father for his mistake. Rafael hadn't deserved to be treated like this. He hadn't done anything wrong, he hadn't disappointed his parents. He had done everything right and although he knew Danny had skipped school and definitely deserved to learn a lesson´ as his father called it, he had protected him none the less. He had taken what Danny had deserved to receive and now he was in trouble with their dad too, for offending him. Danny didn't dare to come forth underneath the blanket when Rafael slowly came back into the room again. He couldn't look his brother in the eyes – didn't wanna see what his father had done. He didn't want to see what had happened to Rafael due to him, to his failures – he just couldn't cope with it. He felt his brother's hand on his small shoulders.

"It's okay kid, it's okay. He won't hurt you tonight – it's over. You did a great job. You've

done exactly what I wanted you to – you didn't disappoint me. Don't you worry kid – everything's alright now. Sleep now..."

He could hear Rafael's choked but still soothing words. He felt so bad for his brother who was still trying to soothe and protect him. He tried to stay strong for his sake and stop crying, but it wouldn't work – he just couldn't. He could hear his brother moaning silently when he got back to bed and then he was silent. Danny was still crying and he didn't stop doing it until he finally fell into an unpleasant dream.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9:

Joaquin's social-worker seemed to be a dedicated, caring person. Someone one could talk to and trust in. She had been the first person the Matthews had called right after informing the police about Joaquin's disappearance.

His social-worker, Carla Scott, had waited for them at the entrance hall of the building social-care was placed in with a deeply concerned look on her face. Her passion for the job was clearly noticeable – she loved these kids like they were her own. At least that was how it seemed to Vivian and Martin, who Jack had wanted to talk to the woman.

Carla Scott was still pretty young with her 28 years of age, but she was doing this job for 7 years now and the one thing she had received through the years of time – was experience. But she never had lost her compassion for the job or her sympathy for the kids. She loved what she was doing and experiencing the disappearance of Joaquin Matthews made her feel sad. She had taken care of a lot of kids with the years and she had guided almost all of them to a good adolescence and a future worth fighting for. Of course there had been a handful of cases, where she hadn't been able to help, where she couldn't save the kids from falling. But they were few – for heaven's sake.

Troubles were naturally occurring when it came to kids and dealing with mostly teenagers, who had rather lost their parents or had been abandoned and who wished for nothing more, but to be left alone and live an independent life was one of the most trouble filled experience one had to deal with. These kids were rather angry about being left alone which made them act rude and aggressive or they were simply sad and afraid about it and that would make them feel depressed. She had cases of open verbal and even physical attacks to foster parents and she also had dealt with kids who spent most of their time locked in their private rooms to cry. She had seen so many kids through the years that were somehow traumatized, that – at very hard times – she sometimes had wished to give up. But seeing that she was able to help, seeing these kids come back to life, blossom again and finally reaching their goals in life made her happy. And it made her feel proud.

Joaquin Matthews was one of these deeply troubled kids and he had grown angry about his fate. He didn't understand why it was him, who had to go through all this mess in his life and the unfairness of it all, had finally resulted in aggression. She frequently had been talking to the Matthews in the last couple of month. Had listened to their fears and worries about losing their hold on Joaquin and she had tried to assure them to keep up with it. But she has been troubled too, although she wouldn't admit it to the foster parents. But the change in Joaquin's behavior – who had formerly at least tried to get along with the Matthews – had appeared so sudden, that she had been almost sure, that some situation must have occurred that was the cause for it. But she had been busy with some other case – of abuse – that she didn't have the time to take care of Joaquins' problems.

Right now she was cursing herself for not taking the time or at least let somebody else take care of it. She wasn't the only one working for social-care! One of her co-workers could have taken care of the problem, if she only had been less eager about taking care of all her cases all on her own. If Joaquin would at least had someone to talk to, maybe they would've found a solution, maybe he wouldn't have ran away. But it was to late for this now and the only thing she was doing about it right now, was feeling guilty. She felt so awful and anxious not to know where the teenage boy was, if he was alright and if they would ever find him. But she was willing to do anything in her powers to help the officials to find the boy.

Right now she was getting her chance to do so and she was extremely eager to do it. She tried to put a smile on her concerned face when she greeted the two FBI agents that had come to talk to her. They were taking the elevator upstairs to her office and she took the time to hopefully find out if there had been any progress made.

"You found out anything about Joaquin up to now?"

"Nothing that would help us to find out about his current residence."

She hadn't expected to be inducted to the results of their investigation. She was no relative of Joaquin and she didn't have the same connection his foster parents had. She understood that they kept restrained about giving any information to her, but she wished to know about him none the less. She couldn't keep herself from questioning them once again.

"Have you been talking to Sara? His girlfriend – I mean, they are pretty close I guess. I could imagine he would've told her where he was going to."

When she looked into the faces of the two agents she could see an expression of surprise. She asked herself if she had done anything wrong, if there was anything about her proposal that hadn't been okay. It had been a bit rude to propose what to do in the case of Joaquin Matthews. It was their job to find missing people, they probably knew pretty well what to do. But in the end she just wished to help – nothing more.

"You know about his girlfriend?"

"Sure I do. He told me about her about two weeks ago. He had been to my office after school for a little chat, that's when he told me he had a girlfriend named Sara. Is there anything wrong about it?"

"No, it's just... Joaquin's foster parents didn't know about her."

She nodded silently and the sad expression returned to her face.

"I'm not surprised about that. He didn't trust them, he wouldn't talk to them – I mean not really. He would never tell them anything personnel. I have no idea what made him trust me, but he definitely told me more about his private life, than he would tell his parents..."

The elevator doors opened and Carla guided the two agents to her office and offered them to sit down. She had Joaquin's file lying on her desk, although she wouldn't really be in need of it. She knew the history of almost all the children she currently was taking care of by heart – another sign of her dedication.

"So, what do you need to know?"

"We need to know about Joaquin's familiar background, his corporal parents or any still living relative. Anyone he would've run to?"

"I don't think so... His corporal parents – Diego and Rosa – immigrated to the U.S. illegally. His real last name is Mantego, but it's most likely that the parents changed their name when they entered the country. Therefor we don't know about any other relatives of him. The one thing we know for sure is that his parents entered the country by crossing the Mexican border. But that doesn't necessarily mean they were Mexicans. They could have gotten there from far deeper south, but they weren't able to tell us. Joaquin's parents died in a plane crash. They had been to L.A. for about a week and Joaquin had stayed at home all alone – I guess they were celebrating that they had managed to get here without being found. Joaquin had to attend school when they took their holidays, therefor he hadn't joined them. On their flight back from L.A. to San Diego the small plane that was supposed to take them home crashed. They were dead immediately."

A few moments of silence followed after her statement about the parents. It was a tragedy and that was always hard to take, even for someone who wasn't involved. At least politness dictated to take a moment of silence. But it was over soon.

"They lived in San Diego?"

"Yes, that's right."

"How did Joaquin get to live in New York then?"

"Well, that's a bit difficult. Social-care down in San Diego had difficulties to find a family for him. So they searched around in the nearer area, but they wouldn't find anyone who was willing to take care of him. They finally found a social-worker, that would be me, and a family – the Matthews – for him, but well – here in New York. So he had to move over. And as we were taking care of his case, immigration right here in the city had to take care of him to. but they had no chance to move him out of the country. He was born in the U.S. after his parents had immigrated. He's a native American."

What do you know about his time in San Diego? Does he still have any friends down there?"

"I don't think so. He was nine years old when he was transferred and he never told me about any friends or relatives he had there. It could be that he kept it secret, but – honestly – I don't think so."

"Is there anything else you can tell us, anything he was talking about that's of importance? Any place he mentioned he would like to go to – stuff like that?"

"No, not that I would know. I mean he's not talking about everything with me, but I know pretty much about his private life. He didn't tell me anything like this, at least I don't recall it. But I have everything important written down in the file, maybe I just forgot."

She tapped to the file in front of her on the desk and gave an encouraging smile to the two agents.

"You can take this with you, if you like. I have all the information written down in there and if you would like to know anything else, I will help you in every way I can."

The two agents rose and the woman took the file from her desk. Carla reached out a hand and said goodbye to them.

"Well – thanks for your help so far, Miss Scott."

"I really hope I have been helpful. I just wish you find Joaquin soon and hopefully he'll be okay..."

"We'll do our best to fulfill your wish."

"Thanks – and goodbye."

They left her office and she was alone now with her thoughts and fears about Joaquin. She knew she couldn't do anything more to help find him. But that didn't make her feel any better. She just hoped and prayed he would be alright – right now she could do nothing more but wait for it to happen.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10:

His brother had promised to be at home, when he would be back from school today. He had promised to clean up the mess they had left in the past two weeks and get some lunch – some proper lunch – for them tonight. They would be visited by someone from social care tonight and by the outer appearance of their living space, they would decide if Rafael was allowed to still stay in custody of his younger brother. It was an important day and Danny had been nervous about it since weeks. And he was afraid, although he never would tell his brother, but he was afraid they would decide he had to leave, wouldn't be allowed to stay here and would be send to some foster family.

Sometimes it was hard living under one roof with Rafael, but most of the time – it was fun and it was a very relaxed life, with no speeches and no responsibility. Rafael didn't care if he went to school, he didn't care when he got home, when he went to bed or who he was meeting when or where. He had all the freedom he wanted and he didn't want his carefree life to change, didn't want these liberties to be limited.

But when he arrived at their dwelling that afternoon, nobody opened the door to his ringing. An uneasy feeling grew in him when he fetched his keys and entered the house and it increased even more when he got up the stairs to the dwelling and stood in front of the closed door. He couldn't hear anything. Normally his brother would be playing music loudly or the TV would be blaring.

After finally opening the door he was on the edge of rather crying or screaming, both would have helped him a lot right now. His brother wasn't at home and the rooms still were the same mess they had been this morning. Clothing, games, cd's, videos, old magazines, pizza card boards and other stuff was lying all over the place covering a big part of the floor. The windows were dirty, the dishes weren't cleaned, the beds weren't made, his brother hadn't ironed the few clothes that had been washed by a graceful neighbour some days ago, the fridge was empty and he hadn't cleaned up the carpets and cupboards. Danny didn't even dare to have a look at the bathroom.

His brother had forgotten the date they had today, he had forgotten about his tasks, had forgotten about his promise – had forgotten about him and now he was left standing here all alone in the middle of this mess with not even half an hour left to make this dirty hole a living space again, before the lady from social work arrived, would start to scream hysterically, fall to the ground unconscious and would take him with her.

He threw his school stuff into a corner of his private room and started to collect the dirty clothes and put them into his brother's empty bedroom cupboard so they were out of sight in first place. Afterwards he searched for their private stuff – games, videos and things like that and put down the two piles into a corner of each of their rooms. He had just managed to get the garbage collected and put into a garbage back and had hot water streaming into the sink so he would at last get the dishes cleaned up, although they would still be forming an abstract work of art in the kitchen, when the doorbell rang. The lady from social work had arrived and his brother still wasn't at home. He needed a damn good and believable explanation for his brother missing this date. He had a last skeptic look at the dwelling, sighed and cursed silently – it looked slightly better but it was still a mess and if she would just have a slightly closer look this would end up in a catastrophy. Maybe he could just act like there was no one at home and she would leave...

But that would leave a bad first impression, even worse than being home and having tried to clean up the place, and she definitely would come back. He had no other chance but to open up on her. He just knew one thing for sure – he wouldn't leave this place – never in the world and whatever she would do, but she wouldn't force him to leave this life he was currently living. It was too precious to him as that he could actually lose it.

The woman rang the bell a second time, more forcefully and impatient now and Danny hurried to open the door. He had almost winced and slammed the door in panic when the woman finally stood in front of him, for she wasn't alone. There was a police-officer with her.

He didn't get what this was all about. Had he done something wrong? Was there anything he hadn't been allowed to do of which he didn't know? Did they already know he was alone and would take him with them? He tried to stay calm and focus on the task lying in front of him. He needed to show these people that his brother was capable of taking custody of him, that he took care of an orderly daily routine and that he wasn't lacking of anything. He gave the woman a nervous fake smile.

"Hi."

"You're Daniel?"

"Yeah, that's me..."

The cop stepped beside the woman and gave him a serious look.

"You have to join us, boy."

Mildly panicking now, Danny took a step backwards, away from the two adults.

"Why?"

"Daniel, I'm Julie Neveal from social care and I fear you have to join me. I'm gonna take you to youth felware office."

"No. There is no problem, Mam. Everything's okay, I'm fine here. I know the place is a little messed up, but I'm really fine – there's nothing to complain about. You came here to decide that I could stay. I know my brother is late, but he'll be here in a moment. He probably had to stay at work some time longer, but he will be here in a few moments and you can talk to him, he can tell you I'm fine!"

He was nervous and so afraid, he was talking extremly fast and he could hear his spanish accent getting more audible with every word. He just needed to convince her she couldn't send him away, by all means necessary.

The cop answered instead of the woman.

"Your brother won't come back home, boy."

A sudden feeling of complete panic, helplessness and fear rushed over him. What did he mean? Why wouldn't Rafael come back? What had happened to him? Where was he? Was he in any trouble? Did he have an accident?

"Of course he does. Why shouldn't he?"

"Your brother was arrested, kid. For possession of drugs..."


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11:

The family of Sara Peréz lived in an old brick house building, with about 15 flats in it. It was a housing probably build in the 50th and it definitely needed a renovation. But as the owner of such houses weren't really interested to spent a lot of money and the tenants couldn't afford to pay even more for their flats – this wouldn't happen.

Sam and Danny had informed Jack about the information they had received from Joaquin's class teacher and he had ordered them to talk to Sara first. As she was the one who had a close connection to Joaquin, he had probably told her, where he had gone to. But if she didn't know anything, it was most likely that Joaquin had been forced to leave, that he had no choice or that his reasons for leaving would've endangered his girlfriend, so he wouldn't tell her. But being optimistic it was pretty certain, that Sara knew at least something that would help them to find Joaquin.

Now – after they had arrived at the old, six stores high building – Sam and Danny entered.

The Peréz family lived on the fourth floor and they had to climb up the old wooden stairs to get there. Sam knocked on the door and they could hear heavy steps inside and somebody murmuring.

"Yeah, yeah – I'm on my way."

The door was opened and they looked into the face of an overweighed, unshaved man in his fourties, wearing jogging pants and a formerly white undershirt. He looked at them in surprise and he also seemed to be a bit angry – his words proved that even more.

"Who the hell are you?"

"Mr. Peréz? I'm agent Taylor, this is agent Spade. We're from FBI. We would like to talk to your daughter."

The view on his face changed from anger to confusion.

"Daughter?"

"Sara?"

"Oh, yeah. Well – I'm not her father, I'm her uncle. Is she in any trouble?"

"No, no she isn't. We just need to talk to her about a friend of hers."

The man shrugged and opened the door on them.

"Whatever, man. I'll call her."

"Sara! Tienes visitadores que quieren hablar contigo. Muevete – inmediamente !"

Sara's answer – if she gave one – wasn't audible, but some seconds later they could hear the harsh, loud closing of a door and a moment later a young, darkhaired girl stood beside the man who had opened up on them. She looked at them in surprise and concern and then she whispered some words to her uncle.

"No los conosco! Porqué quieren hablar conmigo?"

She seemed scared – her voice was slightly trembling and her eyes had widened while she was talking to her uncle. Sam didn't get what Sara was asking him, but Danny was able to answer her desperate question.

"Sara, you don't need to be afraid. We're with the FBI and we would like to ask you a few questions about your friend Joaquin Matthews."

You could literally see how her face enlightened – a smile rushed over her lips.

"Joaquin? Sure – if I can help you..."

"We hope so. May we come in?"

Sara exchanged looks with her uncle, who shrugged and turned around. He murmured to her while he went back to the living room and to his TV-show, he was watching.

"Habla con ellos en **tu** habitación !"

Sara gave a nervous smile to the two federal agents she had to face – especially to Danny for she knew he had understood her uncles' words.

"I'm sorry – he doesn't mean to be rude. Please excuse his behavior."

Danny gave her an assuring smile.

"I guess that's okay – we won't take it personally."

A nervous laugh emerged from Sara's lips. Then she invited them to follow her to her private room – as her uncle had wanted her to.

Sam frowned by the sight of Sara's private place. She had seen a lot of teenager's rooms and this one was the most astonishing thing she had ever seen. It was cleaned up, everything was orderly put down and there was nothing that wasn't at the place it was supposed to be. She probably was the most orderly teenager in the state of Rhode Island.

She sat down on her bed and nervously had a look around her room, as if she was looking out, if there was something suspicious in it that would drew their attention. Sara pointed to the couch on the left side of her room and cleared her throat. She still seemed to be extremely nervous, but her class teacher had already told them she was very shy.

"Sit down, if you like to..."

They followed her offer and Sam took the chance to start a conversation.

"Sara, your class teacher informed us, that you are a good friend of Joaquin – is that right?"

"Well – yeah. You could say that."

As Sam had expected him to do, Danny was correcting her right now.

"He actually told us that you are Joaquin's girlfriend?"

A slight red tone appeared on her cheeks as he announced the question to her.

"Yeah, I am. We are a couple for about five weeks now..."

She whispered the words as if she didn't want anyone to hear them. All of a sudden she rose her head and a concerned look appeared on her face.

"Is he in any trouble? Joaquin – I mean – has he gotten himself into any trouble?"

Sam took the chance to use Sara's question for another one.

"What makes you believe he's in trouble?"

A few moments of silence followed as if Sara tried to find the right words for her response. Hearing her answer, Sam was pretty sure she had searched for words, that wouldn't sound rude.

"Well, I don't normally have two FBI agents sitting in my private room, asking me about my boyfriend. The guess that something was wrong with him wasn't too far away."

The girl was clever – and she was careful. As her teacher had told them. Sam was pretty sure – that even if she knew something about Joaquin – they wouldn't get her to talk. She was extremely careful about her choice of words. Danny finally gave the information to her, that she wanted to hear about.

"Joaquin's missing. His parents reported his disappearance this morning and we're trying to get some information that will help us to find him."

"Disappeared? You mean – he was running away?"

"We don't know yet. Did he tell you something like this? Did he tell you he wanted to run away or did he behave in a strange way?"

"No. Not really. I mean, I knew he had trouble with his foster parents sometimes and he told me how much he wished to get rid of their constant control and protection, but I never actually believed he would run from home. He was just mad and furious, but I never felt he was desperate enough to run away. No, I don't think he would have done that."

"Do you recall anything else, that would explain Joaquin's dissappearance ? Has there been any more trouble?"

Sara crossed her arms before her chest and the features of her face got harder.

"No!"

They had to be careful now. She didn't want to talk about it – probably about the situation with Miguel Luis. It must've been extremely difficult and painful for her. She seemed to be a pretty sensitive young woman and Miguel Luis' words probably hurt her deeply.

"Your class teacher told us – Joaquin was in a fight with a guy from your school. Miguel Luis?"

She closed in more and more, turning their face from them.

"I don't wanna talk about it..."

"Sara, this may be important. I know it's painful for you. But maybe this situation caused Joaquin to decide to do something stupid? He's in love with you – maybe he wanted to protect your honor?"

"Like getting to Miguel Luis and trying to hurt him? No – he wouldn't have done this!"

"What makes you so sure?"

"Because I asked him not to..."

"So he was talking about doing it?"

"Yes he was – but he wouldn't have done it, believe me. I told him if he wanted to prove that he loves me, he should stay away from Miguel. He only would've got hurt..."

"Is there anything else you recall, that would explain his disappearance ? Anything you two were talking about, any kind of strange behavior?"

Sara took some time, as if she needed to think about it.

"No – at least nothing I'd remember."

They rose from the couch in Sara's room and Danny gave the FBI's missing persons unit's card to her.

"If there's anything else you recall, anything that might help us find Joaquin – please give us a call."

She took the card and gave him another shy smile.

"Okay."

She guided them to the door and said goodbye, before she closed the door on them. Danny exchanged looks with Sam, taking some moments to piece the words together.

"She is lying."

He finally stated as a result of their interview with Sara Peréz. Sam gave him a look and turned to leave the building.

"I know."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12:

As days of destiny seem to be somehow miraculous and mysterious in people's minds, because they are of such great importance, the day things in his life changed had been one of the most normal days he ever had spent during his childhood. There had been no big deal about it – up to the point the day changed his life and set a new course for the future of his young life.

It was one of the last days before summer holidays and also one of his last days in primary school he would ever have. He had to promise to his mother not to skip school ever again – not as long as she still lived and would be able to find out about it. And after what happened to Rafael, after what his father had done, how angry he had become, it had been the most liked thing he had done - to promise her. But today it wouldn't work. He already had felt sick and tired when he had gotten up this morning, but he didn't dare to tell anyone. He just wished to leave the house as soon as possible and hoped the day would end soon, hoped it wouldn't be that much boring. But as last days before holidays always were, the day seemed to get longer and longer with every minute. And he really felt sick. But he wouldn't tell his teachers or class-mates, for he didn't want them to inform his parents. He didn't want his dad to get angry with him again. He didn't want him to hurt anyone.

But as luck didn't seem to be one of his qualities today, they had sports class that day at school. He knew he wouldn't get through this lesson the way he felt, but he feared his father's reaction too much to admit he didn't feel okay. So he got changed in the locker room and stepped inside the gym with the rest of his class, without telling anyone how weak and sick he felt. He tried to stay strong, tried to get through the lesson, tried to keep himself upright – but as if it was just meant to happen, he – in complete exhaustion – collapsed to his knees right in front of his teacher, who mildly panicked not even a second later:

"Daniel! Good lord, boy! Are you alright?"

He tried to focus on his teacher, tried to find the right tone for his words to convince her, that he was okay. That he just needed to sit down for a moment. But he only was able to mutter his words.

"I'm okay, I'm fine – just a little tired. I need a moment to rest – that's all. I'm really okay."

"No boy – you're not! You're not okay. You just collapsed to the ground right in front of my eyes. I'm gonna call your parents – they can take you home."

He tried to insist, tried to keep her from leaving, tried to stop her from calling his parents. His father would be absolutely furious about him. He would get angry and somebody would get hurt. But he was too slow, too weak. She was already out of the gym-hall and into the private room to make the call to the principal's office.

The school had called his parents to get him home and his father – probably with drenching teeth, barely hiding his anger about being disturbed on his free day off work – had agreed to take him home. Danny had been sure his father wouldn't come alone; his mother would join him – so his father wouldn't get angry with him. He needed another target to put his aggression on, that's why his mother would be joining him – to protect her child.

The two of them arrived at his school about twenty minutes later and he could see the concerned look on his mother's face as she rushed to him right now. He was close to tears when he saw her like this. He had disappointed her once again – he had promised her not to skip school, not to disturb his father, not make him angry. But he had done.

"Mom, I'm so sorry..."

He whispered to her in desperation, but she didn't even seem to care about it. She was simply concerned about his condition and she only wanted to calm and soothe him.

"It's okay, honey. Don't you worry, everything's okay. Please don't be afraid darling, please don't cry. You haven't done anything wrong, it's all good."

"But dad..."

She wouldn't allow him to finish his sentence – her face clearly told him to stop talking. But although he followed her silent demand, he wouldn't feel any less scared about the consequences of the call the school had to give to his parents.

His mother gently but forcefully guided him to the car, where his father was standing besides the backdoor. He wore an expression of sympathy and concern on his face, that looked that much fake, Danny had the feeling it must be physically painful. But he knew this expression would vanish as soon as his teacher from sports lesson and his class-teacher would've disappeared out of sight, as soon as he was alone with his family.

"Get inside the car – now!"

His father hissed at him and he hurried to obey to his demand to not make him any more angry. He just wished to get home, wished to go to bed and sleep. He felt so tired.

His mother took her seat besides his dad at the front and threw another concerned look at him.

"What happened, honey? What's up with you?"

He needed some seconds to form the words that would answer her question. He was still feeling drowsy from the exhaustion he had about the sports lesson.

"I don't feel so good..."

He managed to say, which was commented by a hard, short laugh from his father's lips. Although he had his eyes closed, Danny could literally see the reproachful look his mother shot at him right now without saying a word. He knew it was only a matter of seconds until they would start argueing, until his father would start to yell at her.

"Don't you look at me like this!"

Obviously his Mom had a lot more courage today, then she normally would bring up, when he started to get angry with her.

"Why shouldn't I? I have all the right in the world to be reproachful! If there once will be the day you'll take responsibility for your children and show some sympathy for them, I will stop looking at you like this!"

"Don't you dare to talk to me like that! What the hell do you know about responsibility!"

Danny had expected her to be quiet now, to give in to his fathers' insults and not let him rage much more. But – to his surprise – she wouldn't. For once in her life she was willing to fight back.

"I'm raising my kids – all on my own, because you don't give a damn about them. I know a hell lot about responsibility!"

His father was driving fast, much faster than some minutes ago, before they had started to fight. He was driving too fast and Danny feared – sooner or later – he would lose control of the car. It was only a question of time. The two needed to stop, needed to stop yelling, needed to stop throwing their rage and hatred – their emotions at each other. It was endangering them all.

"Stop it. Please."

He managed to whisper, but none of them had either heard his words or was willing to listen to them. They just went on with their discussion and his father – with some satisfaction – finally had found a way to break into his mother's defense."

"You know about responsibility? You raise the kids? You believe you are a good mommy? Don't you! That's what you believe – you believe you're such a wonderful caring mother, don't you!"

Right now, she didn't dare to answer and that seemed to assure him even more to go on – he had broken her will to insist against him, her will to fight.

"Look at your wonderful skills as a mother. I had to skip my day off to get our son home from school, just because you weren't able to properly take care of him! Stupid, little bitch! This wouldn't have happened if you would've taken care of his condition, if you would've looked after him! He wouldn't be sick right now – and I wouldn't have been disturbed during my hard earned holiday – if you had taken your responsibility as a mother! But you didn't – so don't you talk to me like this ever again – goddamn it!"

Danny felt awful right now – his father was taking his mistakes on his Mom once again. This wasn't her fault, it was all about him and his failures, but he hadn't been strong and courageous enough to tell him, to insist against him and now she had to take the blame. The only thing he wished for, was protecting her. He wished to protect her from him, wished for her to feel happy and safe again. Wished for him to stop.

He just couldn't take it any longer – his yelling, his cursing, his insults. She was his mother and he loved her and he just desperately wished for his father to stop dishonoring her. He let his emotions rush over him and didn't even think about what he was doing next, about the consequences – not even for a second.

"Stop yelling at her – goddamn it! She hasn't done anything wrong!"

There was silence – just for a second. Icy, deadly silence. Then his father turned halfway around on the driver's seat, taking his eyes off the street. His face was deeply red and Danny believed he had never seen his father raging that much. He was so furious about his little outburst, that Danny actually feared he would just stop the car right away and beat him to death. But he would never get the chance to do so...

His mother started to yell hysterically in fear and panic all of a sudden and his father never got the chance to respond to him. When he turned back to his wife to find out what she was screaming about, Danny could see it too. His father had accidentally crossed the street to the other side and was directly heading to a fast speeding truck now. The only thing Danny was still able to do – besides staring at the vehicle directly approaching to them – was screaming. Screaming for his father.

"DAD!"

His father grabbed the wheel hard and tried to change the direction of their car to escape the inevitable car-crash. But it was too late, much too late.


	13. Chapter 13

A.N.: I'm so very sorry it took me so long to update. I have been really busy for the last couple of weekends and haven't been home much. But now I finally found the time to get an update to the story. Hope you like it. Please RR.

Chapter 13:

When he woke up from unconsciousness again, it seemed that something about the outside world was deeply wrong. He didn't get what it was in the first place, he was too much focused on piecing together his memories, to find out what had just happened to him. He remembered his sports lesson and him feeling sick, he remembered his mother's concerned face and his father yelling at her about something she hadn't done and that was no justifiable reason to treat her like this. But he wouldn't remember anything else.

The memories came back on him slowly, very slowly and with it his senses seemed to regain full consciousness once again. He realized what was wrong about the world around him – it was all black. And the reason for this, was the fact that he tightly held his eyes closed. He had no idea why he had done so and as it was of no use, because he wished to find out what was going on around him, what had happened to him, he opened them up. Seconds later – the few seconds of realization he needed – he wished he hadn't, but it was too late now. He was unable to close them again, unable to look away. He had no chance to escape the terrible sight right in front of his eyes, although his mind screamed at him to look away, but he just couldn't. He wished to scream, wished to cry, wished to yell for someone to help, but not a sound would emerge from his lips.

The one thing he saw in first sight, the one thing that was all over the car and the one thing he even could feel on his clothes, naked forearms and face – was blood. But not his own, he didn't even feel pain right now, didn't feel like he was injured. It was his parents' blood that had splattered all over the place and had soaked his clothes. He still was unable to look away, couldn't get the scene out of his sight, actually didn't dare to move away, but he found his speech once again. Choked, whispered words in a trembling voice. A desperate question. A question that wouldn't be answered – not ever again.

"Mommy? Dad?"

He didn't even recall, when he had called his mother mommy´ for the last time. Must've been years ago – he probably still had been in kindergarten then. But he was so afraid, so deeply scared right now, that he didn't care. He needed to hear her voice to calm down again and his young innocent heart seemed to keep up the illusion, that – although all the circumstances around him almost screamed to him that he was wrong – she was still alive. But his illusion stayed one – he wouldn't receive an answer. He was unable to give up on her – on both of them right now. They were his parents, the people that loved him and cared about him the most – they wouldn't just leave him alone, they would never! They wouldn't just go away without a word! He knew they were still alive – he just knew it! They couldn't be dead, he only needed to wake them up! He wished to move from the place he was sitting at, but he was unable to, the belt kept him where he was. He was trapped in the car, unable to reach his parents, unable to touch them, to give them a squeeze and make them wake up finally. He desperately reached out an arm and stretched his fingers to touch at least one of them.

"Come on, come on! You can do this!"

He whispered to himself, tried to assure himself to get to his parents. But it wouldn't work, he had no chance to reach them this way. His racing thoughts finally managed to piece a more reasonable solution together: He needed to get rid of this christ' forsaken belt, that kept him pinned to the backseat of the car. He had no other chance... With trembling fingers he reached down for the belt and tried to open it up. He didn't believe it would work, believed that it had somehow stuck due to the heavy impact to the car, but – like a miracle becoming reality – he easily could open it up. He didn't even think about it any longer and he didn't even take the time to scan his own young, fragile body for any injuries that could get worse if he moved around. The only wish, the only thought and desire he had, was to have a look at his parents faces. He wanted to reach them, grab, hug and shake them until they'd wake up.

But as he got them into full sight right now, all he could do, all he was still able to do – was scream.

His mother's face looked like it always did – except for one thing: her extremely widened eyes, that looked like they were made of glass. They were rid of all emotion and expression – dead. But that wasn't the worst thing about her appearance. His eyes saw what had happened to her, but his mind just simply negated that it was the truth. It couldn't be – it was to plain and simple, it couldn't just have happened like this. But the facts were speaking for themselves – his mom was definitely dead.

Due to the impact of the car crash, one of the metal props, that held the front window of the car at it's position had been bended and had cracked of into a level position. The belt hadn't been able to keep his mother in the position she had been sitting in before the crash, it hadn't protected her. She probably had been flung afront by the powers of the impact and that had caused her chest to directly hit the prop. She hadn't had a chance – the piece of metal had pierced her chest and hit her heart when it entered. She had been dead immediately. Only the frozen expression on her face stated her disbelief and complete horror about what had been happening, but except for that there was no more reaction from her. The piece of metal that was stuck to her body sended shivers down his back. It looked so unnatural, so scary – like a cybernatic implantation that had failed in his function. The piece of metal pitilessly had pint her to her seat in an unbelievably unnatural position.

He realized – despite all the fear and anxiousness he felt – that there was no blood flowing from the wound in her chest. There were slight traces of red on the blouse she was wearing at the space the prop had hit her, but there was nothing more. No pool of blood that colored her clothes in a deep red. He knew the prop must have hit a major artery, but the blood she must've been loosing from the impact didn't leave her system. If she wouldn't have been killed by the piece of metal that ripped her heart apart instantly, she slowly would've bled to death. He was almost glad the later option hadn't occurred – he believed he would've gone crazy seeing her suffering and die slowly.

But if she wasn't the one losing that much blood, there was only one other option. He actually feared to turn his head, but he did it none the less - like an automatical reaction.

As he had expected it was his father, who had spilled most of his blood to the interior of the car. Danny could feel the sickness grow in his stomach as he had a look at his father's pale, blood spilled face with the dead eyes directly staring at him. The furious expression he had, when he had turned around to him had mixed with an expression of fear and desperation – probably occuring at the moment he saw the truck they had been running in and would stay as an eternal expression on his lifeless face.

The blood his father was losing or had been losing after the crash came from a wound to his carotid arteries. The rest of his body seemed intact by a first look – so he was the one who had the fate, his mother would have gone through if the metal hadn't hit her heart. He had bled to death. But as the major arteries pumped more than a litre of blood per heartbeat, it wouldn't even have taken a minute until he was dead.

When the car smashed into the truck and the front window was ripped apart, pieces of glass had been flying around. One of the more bigger parts of the glass had put up enough speed to enter the interior of the car. This was what had hit his father's neck and had cut his throat. It was still stuck there between his bloody pale skin of the neck and the driver's seat. It probably had cut his windpipe too and Danny just hoped he had been unconscious by the bloodloss before he started to suffocate.

Both of his parents had died a horrible, unhonorable, senseless death and he could just hope that they hadn't suffered. He just didn't get the fact to his mind that he was still alive. He simply had no idea how he was able to survive this. Why the lord had decided to save his life. And then realization rushed over him: What had he done? What had he caused?

All of a sudden the smell of blood invaded his nose and made him feel nauseous. He started to panic, the only thought still in his mind was how to escape the situation as quickly as possible. He desperately wished to get out of the car, away from the terrible sight, away from his dead parents – away from his own guilt. That was what this was all about. This was his fault – his alone. He was responsible for his parents' death. If he wouldn't have forced them to drive him home from school, if he only had been stronger, they never would've started that fight. And even if they had done it, if he wouldn't have insisted against his father, wouldn't have made him angry, so he turned around to face him, he wouldn't have crossed the street. They never would've hit that truck and both of them would still be alive if he had kept his mouth shut. It was his fault, he was responsible – he had killed his parents.

Somewhere in the distance he could hear sirens of an ambulance coming closer. Somebody probably had reported the accident and now the medics were looking for any survivors. He wished to cry, simply by thinking the word – survivor. The only one who was still alive in here was him and he didn't deserve to live. He was a murderer. He didn't want the medics to arrive, didn't want them to find him, didn't want to be pulled out and brought to a hospital. Right now the only thing he wished for was to die – right here and right now. He knew he was to blame and he would never get rid of the guilt he was feeling. Apart from that, he had no idea how he should explain this to the rest of his family – to his brothers and sisters. They would blame him, they would hate him – they would want him to leave...

"Go, go away..."

He whispered, but he knew the ambulance wouldn't turn. They would arrive at the sight of the accident in a few moments and there was nothing he could do about this. As he tried to move back, as far away from the splattered glass window at the front of the car as he could, he suddenly felt a wave of hot pain rushing through him. It left him unable to move back any further and he couldn't breathe in any more. He could feel the drowsyness take him over and then the pain vanished and everything went black.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14:

Danny was brought to hospital by the medics, that had arrived at the scene of the accident about 15 minutes after it had occurred. The driver of the truck – only slightly injured – had been reasonable enough to get to the next phone booth along the street and had called an ambulance. The medics had been reliefed to at least find someone, who was still alive in the smashed car. The boy seemed to have cracked some rips due to the heavy impact and he had some deep cuts on his forearms and thighs, but apart from that he had survived the crash unharmed. He had been unconscious when they had found him and that's what made the medics assume he had a – pretty heavy – concussion.

The medics had left him in the custody of the E.R. doctors and had told them about his condition. They were taking care of him right now in one of the trauma rooms. The doctor in charge had sent one of the nurses to talk to the paramedics and find out about the boy's name and about any relatives they could call. She stepped out of the trauma room and gave the two medics, still waiting outside with a concerned look on their faces, a smile.

"Hey guys…"

She was interrupted before she even was able to ask them the question the doctor had about his young patient.

"How is he? He will be okay, won't he?"

"As I heard the doctor say, he has been pretty lucky. The cuts are pretty deep and definitely will hurt for some time and he won't be able to run and jump around for the next few weeks, but he's just slightly injured. It's a miracle."

"Yeah, you could say that ! Taking into consideration what has happened to his parents…"

Her curiousity gained the victory about the orders she had received by the doctor.

"What happened to them?"

"The mother's heart was pierced by a piece of metal and the boy's father had his throat cut by a piece of splattered glass from the front window. No pretty sight at all!"

"Oh good lord – that's awful. Poor little boy! Do you believe he saw them? Saw their corpses – I mean?"

The medic hesitated for some moments, having a critical look through the glass window into the trauma room at his young patient he had brought in.

"No, I don't think so. I guess he's been unconcious for the whole time. I mean – it obviously are pretty painful injuries and he has a concussion. I don't think he has been conscious, feeling the pain. No, he hasn't seen them."

She finally seemed to remember why she was standing outside here with the medics now that her curiousity had been fed with information.

"You have any idea about the boy's or his parent's name?"

"Yes, actually. We found his mother's purse a few feet away from the car. We thought it might be useful to you. It's still in the bus."

One of the medics went back to the ambulance and fetched the purse. He handed it to the nurse, who said goodbye to them and took it to a more quiet place she could search for an address, a name or a phone number at. All the way through her search, she was trying to ignore the blood spilled on it.

The hospital – after the nurse had finally found the number - had called at his parents house, talking to Rafael who already had been home and – as it was normal policy – had informed the police and immigration after their young patient had been brought in and at the office of immigration two federal agents were just about to discuss about the children's fate.

"So they are illegal?"

One of the agents hesitated, flipped through the file once again and tried to get some more time before he answered the question.

"Well,..., you actually can't say it like this..."

He could see the impatient look on his co-workers face when he gave him this uncertain answer.

"What would you say instead?"

"It's a bit difficult..."

"We have a Hispanic family which entered this country under illegal circumstances and now we found out about it. I don't see the problem."

"The problem is that we can't send them back."

"Did I miss something? That's our job."

"They're only kids, one of them is hurt and in hospital right now and they've just lost their parents..."

"What's up with you? You're getting sentimental now? I don't care if they are kids or not and I don't care about their current situation. They are a bunch of people without any right to live here and now we even have to pay for them due to the wonder of social care. Is there any chance we get rid of them?"

"No – the difficulty is, that they actually are all native Americans..."

"How's that?"

"The only illegal immigrants were the parents. The children all were born in the U.S. – so

they legally are American citizens. Except for the oldest child, but he's legally married to a native American woman since two years. Even if we would want to, we can't send them out of the country – they're Americans."

"What about any relatives? The children are without a care person right now."

"By all given respect, but where are we supposed to start? The children don't know where the parents actually came from, except for the oldest brother, but he was about 4 or 5 when his parents immigrated – he won't remember that much. And even if we would ask the embassies of the countries with most illegal immigrants to the U.S. – we can't even be sure Alvarez is their real last name. Maybe they changed it before they entered the country. There's no chance to find anyone any more."

"So, they're staying?"

"From my point of view there is no other legal option. Yes, they're staying."

Rafael, who had been the one that had received the call from the hospital had taken the next chance he had, to find someone that would get him here. He had literally forced Mr. Sanchez – their neighbour from up the street – to drive him to the hospital and now he had left him standing on the parking lot and had rushed into the E.R. He had no idea what had actually happened, how his family was doing and if they would fully recover. The woman he had been talking to on the phone hadn't been willing to tell him anything, not on the phone. She had told him, he needed to come down here and talk to the doctor in person. She had also given him the doctor's name, but he had been to nervous and scared to remember it clearly now.

He arrived at the front desk of E.R. and received a friendly smile from the nurse that was sitting there. He recalled her voice as she addressed him – it was the lady he had been talking to on the phone.

"What can I do for you, young man?"

"You called me and told me to come over. My name's Rafael Alvarez."

The smile on the nurse's face disappeared for a moment.

"Oh, I see. You can wait here for a moment. I'll go get the doctor."

She was gone too quickly, so he didn't get a chance to ask her what was actually going on here. He had to wait once again. He nervously drummed his fingers on the desk and tried to keep his thoughts of catastrophy at bay. He winced when somebody standing behind him addressed him in a deep, full voice.

"Rafael Alvarez?"

He turned around quickly, looking into the face of a bearded man in his fifties in a white coat – the doctor.

"Yeah, that's me!"

The doctor frowned when he saw him in full person now.

"How old are you?"

"I'm 17 – but I don't think that matters right now! My elder brohers and sisters won't be home until tonight, they are all working and I'm not willing to wait that long! Tell me what happened – please!"

The doctor finally gave in to him and nodded approvingly.

"I have been taking care of your younger brother. He and your parents had been in a car-crash. He has several deep cuts and a few broken rips, but apart from that he's okay."

"Thank god! May I see him?"

"Yes of course, but he's still unconscious…"

"Doesn't matter to me."

He was so glad to hear, that Danny was okay, that he would recover, that he had almost forgotten…He stopped dead in tracks and turned to the doctor.

"What about my parents?"

The faked, sad look on the doctor's face answered his question immediately…


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15:

Miguel Luis' family lived a completely different life than Sara Peréz or Joaquin Matthews. His family must've been rich, very rich – taking into consideration that their 15 year old son had his own loft in downtown Manhattan. Sam understood what made the boy be so self-assured – as the teacher had told them. He never experienced anything else but being the most important thing for the people around him.

After informing Jack about the interview with Sara and her statement, that Joaquin had wanted to go after Miguel Luis, he had wanted them both – Sam and Danny – to visit the teenage boy and see if he knew anything about the missing teenager. Although all of them were pretty sure, Miguel wouldn't be a great help, it couldn't be that wrong to question him. Maybe Joaquin had been at his place none the less. At least they would find out a bit more about Joaquin's relation to other comrades at school and maybe that would help them to understand why he had disappeared. Right now, they had entered the building Miguel Luis lived in and had knocked at his loft's door.

A tall, musculous, dark skinned, goodlooking teenage boy opened up on them.

"Miguel Luis?"

"Yeah. And who are you, guys?"

"Agent Taylor and Spade. We're with the FBI."

"FBI – huh? Wow – that's pretty cool. I guess you can identify yourselves?"

Slight annoyance was already rushing over Danny. This boy was testing out how far he could go with them, what they would tolerate. He seemed to see this as amusement, as a game. Well, he was about to see, that it was goddamn serious. But he knew it wasn't a good basis to cut the boy off right at the start. So he shared a look with Sam and they both fetched their badges to identify themselves. A slight smile appeared on the teenager's face.

"So it's really true. Well – what can I do for you guys?"

Sam gave him an extremely friendly and fake smile and answered in a honey-sweet voice.

"You could invite us to step inside for the first part."

"Invite you? I don't even know what the hell you want from me. I would definitely like to know. You know my mommy told me not to let strangers inside the house…"

Another of this self-assured smiles crossed Miguel's face and Danny could feel his temper rise. The boy was getting on his nerves, but he knew he had to stay polite and friendly. Maybe Miguel Luis was able to help them.

"We need to ask you a few questions about Joaquin Matthews – he's going to school with you."

The expression that appeared on Miguel's face now stated disgust – like simply hearing Joaquin's name made him feel sick.

"I don't think I can help you with that. I don't have anything to do with this,…, person."

The way he pronounced the last word made Danny feel sick from anger. How dare he would talk about Joaquin like this? Like he didn't have the same human rights as he did. He shot back at him, his voice soaked with antipathy.

"Well – your class-teacher told us you most likely had something to do with him. You were interested in his girlfriend, but she rejected, she wasn't interested. So you felt like you had to insult her and Joaquin didn't believe it to be very funny. You had a fight with him."

Miguel laughed in a hard tone.

"It wasn't a fight…"

"What was it instead?"

"It was a punishment, a lesson in who was the one in charge. You know a fight presumes that the opponent fights back. But Matthews wouldn't even have the slightest chance to do so."

"He didn't? Your class teacher had to send both of you to the nursery."

"Is that of any importance for your investigation?"

A slight smile appeared on Danny's face this time – he had got the boy to show emotion. He was angry. Maybe Joaquin Matthews wasn't as weak as he wished to believe.

"Of course not. But I'd like to know if he tried to get close to you again?"

"Matthews? I wouldn't even allow him to clean my toilet bowl if I would be in desperate need of someone to do it. And I definitely wouldn't allow him to enter my place!"

"Maybe he tried none the less?"

"I haven't seen the goddamn bastard and I don't want to. What the hell is this all about anyway?"

Sam answered his question, although she wasn't really sure that was a good idea.

"He went missing."

Miguel started to laugh – he laughed out loud and hard.

"He disappeared? The little faggot ran from mommy and daddy ? Didn't his goddamn little bitch of a girlfriend let him in any more? Did he leave somewhere to cry and bathe in his self-pity some more? Serves him right – goddamn, little, anti-social, cowardly bastard!"

Sam didn't even have a chance to react in first place as – after Miguel Luis self-complacent statement, Danny quickly got up from the chair he was sitting at, stepped close to the boy, grabbed him by his collar and pushed him against the wall. The smile he just had about his own statement vanished from the boy's face and fear appeared on it. He was a strong young man, but he immediately seemed to realize that there was nothing he could do against the grip he was held in.

"You think that's funny?"

Sam could hear Danny hissing at the boy, who didn't dare to move, but cried out with a high-pitched voice, complete terror audible.

"Let go of me!"

But Danny wouldn't – he wouldn't let the boy go. Sam jumped up from her seat, rushed to the scene in front of her eyes and forcefully grabbed her co-worker by his arm. She tried to keep her voice at bay, but she sounded warning none the less.

"Danny! Let him go!"

She seemed to have achieved something, for he let the scared boy go, took a step back from him and put up his arms in defense. But he didn't say a single word and Miguel Luis still seemed too scared to react to what had just happened to him. Sam took Danny by his arms once again and pushed him to the entrance door of the house – out of here as soon as possible. She gave Miguel Luis a fake smile, before she left.

"Thanks for your help, Miguel."

With that, she turned her back on him and left the house. Keeping her temper at bay had been a hard task up to that point and right now – stepping out of the house and spotting Danny who was waiting for her at the car – she just let loose.

"What the hell was that? What's wrong with you?"

She didn't receive an answer to her question. Danny didn't seem to be sure about what to tell her, how to explain. She wasn't even certain he had an explanation for this. But that wouldn't calm her temper.

"You must be completely outta your mind to act like that! You even realized what you were doing right now? Goddamn it Danny – you attacked the boy! You attacked a witness, a fifteen year old child! What the hell were you thinking, you were doing?"

He finally seemed to find his speech once again.

"I…I'm sorry. I just lost my temper on that boy. I'm sorry…"

She simply nodded to his apology and walked around the car to open it up. This wasn't the time and the place to talk about it. But she needed to inform Jack about Danny's outburst. It was up to him to decide what to do about it. This wasn't her decision.

She got into the car and opened the door for him.

"Let's go!"


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16:

Julie had dictated Daniel to meet her at her office and have a talk with her. She hadn't told him, why she wanted to talk to him and she had tried to sound as emotionless as she could. She would have another hard, difficult and unpleasant conversation due to Daniel Alvarez and she didn't want to do this once again. She really had promised herself not to give up on any of her children, to guide them through their childhood and to adolescence and find chances for all of them to improve their life, not take a wrong turn and become independent, self-assured adults. And she had also sworn the day she would finally lose faith she would stop doing this job, because that was the day she wouldn't be able to do it with love and dedication any longer.

This was her last, her ultimate chance to change the course Daniel Alvarez had turned to; if this wouldn't work – she no longer knew what to do to help him. The Stevensons had tried once again, but the situation hadn't improved, it had decreased. They had taken Julie's advice into consideration, had listened to their own hearts deeply and hadn't been willing to give up on Danny. So they had been trying once again, they had tried really hard, but it wouldn't help. They had tried not to fight with the boy, but it hadn't even lasted a week until they had been that desperate about Daniel's behavior. They started to argue again, give prohibitions and lose faith. The kid hadn't even tried to listen to them or to do what they wanted.

So by the end of the week Michael and Ruth had another really bad and heated argument with him, even worse – much worse – than ever before and whatever Daniel had said it made Ruth break down crying and that was when the limit was overtaken once again. This time Michael had thrown him out, he hadn't threatened him he would do it, he had simply told him to pack his things and leave and not dare to ever come back. He had told him he never ever wanted to see him there again and if he would he had no idea what he would do. He had been yelling at the boy, screaming at the top of his lungs and had been that tempered he was close to hurting him once again.

Daniel had spent the weekend at a friends house and now – on Monday – after the Stevensons had called her and told her there was no chance in the world they would ever let Daniel enter their house again, whatever she would say, advice, ask, beg or demand, she had to talk to him. She had called at the friend's house and had sent someone from youth welfare to catch him. She had to take a few calls, had spoken with other offices and some foster families and with her boss and finally they had come up with a solution. Taking into consideration that the boy probably felt pretty good for finally breaking the Stvensons good will, and showing her she had no chance to find a family he would fit in, and that she had no right to take his real – his corporal family from him, had the feeling he had finally won, this would be extremely hard for him. She was pretty sure he believed she would give up and allow him to try to live an independent life, but he was wrong with that. She knew this would feel like a sentence, a punishment, a metaphorical slap in the face for him, but there was no other way. He had gone too far, way too far and now he had to take the consequences.

She opened the door to her office and spotted Daniel sitting in front of it, completely relaxed and a slight smile on his face. She asked herself where she went wrong with him and if she could still right the wrongs or if it was too late. And she felt slight anger – she was angry about his ignorance, his lack of sympathy and his arrogant self-assurance.

"Come in."

He rose and followed her to her office. When he had sat down in the chair opposite of her, he was still smiling and her anger finally took over her reactions.

"What are you smiling about?"

"Nothing in particular. I just like to be right with what I tell."

There it was again – his damn self-assurance, this childish believe of knowing anything better and always getting what he wanted.

"And you believe you can be proud about that?"

"I'm not proud, I'm just content."

"You shouldn't be – neither proud nor content, because you haven't done anything that justifies to feel like this. How could you? How could you do that? Don't you realize what you do to these people. The Stevensons are such friendly, caring and lovable people and they tried so hard. What made you just reject and disrespect them? What's wrong with you Daniel?"

"There's nothing wrong. It's like I told you – you won't find anyone who will get along with me."

"So what? You're trying to destroy these people's life, just to make me see I was wrong? Because that's what you do. Good lord, Daniel – Ruth broke down crying! Doesn't that affect you? Don't you feel anything about this, do you even care?"

He didn't answer to her question and she hadn't really expected he would do this. But she hadn't finished her speech by now.

"What do you want me to do? What do you want from me? Let you live your life all alone? You're a 15 years old boy – not even old enough to drink, smoke, vote, marry or drive a car legally! I can't do that and apart from that I don't want to. Because the way you're behaving you don't deserve to try to live independently. You just showed that you're lacking of sympathy, responsibility and a lot of other qualities I would expect of an adult. You don't deserve a chance, kid! What you need is a family who takes care of you!"

She could see the anger on his face, the red stains, the thin lips, the sparkling eyes. He was absolutely furious about her words.

"Tengo una familia!"

He yelled at her. She had expected he would respond in his mother language – the language he had grown up with. In spanish - I have a family.

"You got an older sister which is working in a foreign country, you have an older brother who has a family on his own and you have two younger sisters, who have not even fairly been having that much problems to fit in their foster families!"

"So you already forgot about Rafael!"

"Rafael is in prison, Daniel! He dealt with drugs – he's a criminal! Yeah, he really has been a great care person for you. So responsable and caring about what you needed..."

"He's my brother and he took care of me having anything I needed. You had no right to take me away from there. I don't need these people – these all so lovely people you like so much – and who wish so desperately to play the parents. I have a family – would be great when you finally get that in your head!"

"Don't you talk to me like this, Daniel Alvarez!"

She hollered and he silenced immediately, giving her a surprised and slightly afraid look. He had never experienced her like this.

"I'm not one of your brothers, sisters or friends and I'm not as understandable as the Stevensons have been. So don't you ever dare to talk to me like that! Did you get that?"

He kept quiet and didn't look at her, but she wouldn't let him get away like this. He needed to learn some discipline and it was better to start with it – the sooner the better.

"Did you understand me?"

"Yeah."

She nodded to him – he hopefully had learned this lesson now.

"So – I have talked to the Stevensons. And as you already said – they don't get along with you and they are no longer willing to try. They sent you back here."

"I,...I'm coming back – I don't have to stay there any longer?"

"With one thing you are right – you don't have to stay there any longer..."

"That's fine. I mean – not that they didn't care or something, but..."

"You didn't get me right Daniel. You won't stay at youth welfare... I'm sending you to New York City."

"New York? What the hell am I supposed to do in New York?"

"I found a new foster family for you."

"In New York!?!"

"Exactly – you're leaving tomorrow."

"But,..., but you can't, you can't do this. My whole family is living here, my brothers and sisters! I got friends here. I was born here, I don't know anything else..."

"Stop it right now! There's no discussion about this. The decision is already made. You will get to know new places and you will learn to get along. To be honest with you – I don't care about you having friends and family here. You had your chance, Daniel! We tried more than once and you rejected every help given and any chance offered. You disappointed us once too often and now you have to get along with the consequences."

He looked her in the face, sparkling anger shining from his eyes and lowered his voice to a threatening, desperate whisper.

"You won't make me stay there. Believe me – I won't stay there for long. You will see me here again all too soon. They will send me back to you. You'll see it. You won't make me stay at this goddamn New Yorker family – I will be back in your office in no time..."

She gave him a slight, small, sad smile.

"No Daniel, you won't. At last you won't be back in my office. This is the last time we're talking with each other. I'm no longer in charge of you. As you get a new family in another state – your case will be given to authorities in New York. Accept it boy – whatever you will do from now on: you won't come back here."

"But you can't do this. How could you do this to me?"

"Don't talk to me like this. What did you expect – that I had a look at all you did and would just say okay´ and would go on? You have crossed the line once too often, Daniel. This is your ultimate chance to take the right turn and if you don't use it... There's noone who can make you see you're wrong with your behavior – I already realized this. So it's up to you to realize and I hope you will. If you will manage to get along with your new foster parents, it'll be the one chance you'll receive to grow up, be independent and live your own life. And now I want you to leave this office and I don't want to see you here again, except you'll manage to finish school, get a job and live your life."

She rose, opened the door and signaled him to leave. He followed her instructions unable to speak or react to her revelation. She really had hit him hard – with her decision and her words, but she hoped it had been the right way. She really meant it – this was his ultimate chance and he had to take it. Hopefully he would do the right thing – she still hoped for him to find himself. It maybe was naive, but giving up wasn't an option for her. Not even on Daniel Alvarez.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17:

"Come in."

Sam entered Jack's office and as soon as she stepped in there she started to doubt. Maybe this was wrong, maybe she shouldn't make such a big deal out of it. Danny had lost his temper on that teenage boy and that wasn't right. But running to Jack right away like a little school girl and telling him what had happened, wasn't right either. Maybe she should've talked to Danny again, asked him what was wrong with him and if there was anything she could do to help him out. But she had reacted by impulse, by emotion and now it was too late to step back.

"What is it, Sam?"

She hesitated with her answer and kept silent, while she remebered their drive back to the department.

Flashback

It had been silent, absolutely silent. Danny wouldn't have said a word after they had gotten into the car, but she wasn't sure it was because he was sorry about his behavior or angry about her reaction. She wished to find out, but – actually – she didn't dare to ask him. His emotional reaction on Miguel Luis had pretty much shocked her and she was almost afraid to experience how he would react to her, if she addressed him now. So she kept silent for some more minutes, but when they headed deeper and deeper into downtown, she finally couldn't take it any longer. This was tearing her apart, it was an awful situation. She needed to talk to him. She had to stop at a traffic light, which gave her the chance to face him and start a conversation once again.

"What happened in there, Danny? What was wrong?"

He wouldn't face her and his voice sounded scaryly cold when he answered her question.

"I already told you – I lost my temper on him…"

"Well, that's not okay and I hope for you that you know that!"

"I do know that!"

"Then answer my question! What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong – I'm fine. It was a simple emotional reaction."

She paused for a moment, following the street again as the traffic light flashed green. But she wasn't done with her co-worker – not yet. He needed to spit out what was bothering him that much. It couldn't stay the way it was right now, she couldn't work with him, if his behavior wouldn't change.

"Emotional it was! You could've hurt the boy – you're clear about that ?"

"I didn't mean to, okay! Would you stop this shit, now! I don't wanna talk about it."

She was astonished and almost shocked by his response. She couldn't recall that he ever had been cursing at her in all the years that they knew each other for, now. She never had experienced him being that angry with her. She settled down to a more soothing tone to calm down the conversation.

"Why can't you just tell me? Tell me what's wrong with you? What is it that's bothering you?"

"Goddamn it! There's nothing wrong, okay! I'm still fine and it'll stay this way, if you would ask me another ten times. I'm okay!"

His outburst of emotion made her stay quiet. She couldn't believe this still was the same person she knew and was working with for so long. It just couldn't be. She had experienced him being sad or frustrated, but he never had been that openly aggressive. She knew something was wrong, although he wouldn't tell her, was even lying to her about it. But she knew he was troubled. It was just about what she would make out of it.

End of flashback

"There's,…, something I'd like to talk about with you."

Jack gave her an inviting look, but she still wasn't sure how to piece the words together. She didn't want to peach against Danny. She just wanted Jack to know about the facts and ask him to take care of it.

"It's about the questioning of Miguel Luis…"

She started in a hesitating tone and Jack gave her an interested but also slightly concerned gaze.

"What happened?"

"Well,…, it didn't work out like it should've."

"Sam, I have no idea what it is that you wanna tell me."

"The boy was a little cocky and,…, well,…, it's just… Danny lost his temper on him and,…, and the situation ended up with,…, him attacking the boy…"

"Verbally?"

A moment of awkward silence passed by before she almost just whispered the answer.

"Physically."

"He has been attacking a witness?"

"The boy really was extremely self-assured and he was making fun of Joaquin Matthews. I just don't know what happened next, but Danny completely lost his temper on him. It's not like he hurt the boy or something, but Miguel was pretty scared off…"

"That's not it, is it?"

"No… I was trying to talk to him on our ride back. Wanted him to tell me what happened, if there was anything wrong with him…"

"And…?"

"He was shouting at me. I mean I never experienced him like this. I have no idea what is going on, but he's obviously deeply troubled about something…"

"He told you so?"

"No. He told me he was fine – but that was a lie, obviously. He wouldn't tell me what was wrong, but I just know he's not okay. His behavior is just not like it would normally be. I mean I know he's tempered and I know he reacts pretty emotional from time to time, but this had nothing to do with it. He completely lost it…"

"You want me to talk to him? That's why you came in here, that's why you tell me all this?"

"Yeah. I tried myself already, but he wouldn't let me in. I just hope he's going to listen to you."

"Alright, Sam – I'm gonna take care of it. Hopefully it'll help the situation."

She nodded, but wouldn't thank him. She wasn't sure that getting a co-worker into trouble and forcing him to have a chat with their superior agent – being a friend or not – wasn't something to say thank you´ about.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18:

He knew Rafael was into something, he didn't know what it actually was, but he knew there was something. There was no way in the world his teenage brother – who didn't have a job – could afford to rent a flat and pay both his own and Danny's lifestyle without being involved in something that definitely wasn't completely legal. Danny knew all this and Rafael knew that he did, but he acted like everything was normal. Like there was nothing unusual about the way he financed their lifes.

Danny had been curious for a while now, but he never dared to ask Rafael. He was afraid he would get mad at him and he didn't want to fight with his elder and stronger brother. Apart from that he knew that it was of no use. Rafael wouldn't tell him anything – he hadn't done it until now and he wouldn't do it if he would ask him. Whatever it was Rafael was involved in – he believed Danny had no right to know about it.

But he had other, less obvious ways to find out about it. Rafael didn't care if he attended school or if he just stayed home. The only thing he had asked Danny for was to stay out of his way when he told him so and not to follow him.

Rafael seemed to believe that his natural authority as the elder one the two of them was enough to make his brother fulfill his demands. It actually had worked out, but now curiosity had taken over the will to follow Rafael's authority. He didn't want to get into trouble with his brother, but he also wasn't willing to be kept out of whatever Rafael was doing. He was his brother and Danny believed he had a right to know what was going on.

He knew that following his brother wasn't an option. He had never seen his brother be so paranoid when he left the house. He would've realized he was following him, before he was down the street. He didn't want this to happen. He didn't want his brother to know that he was spying after him. But – no matter how dangerous it would be – he wanted to find out.

The only other option he had, was disobeying to Rafael's demand to stay out of his way. He knew Rafael was on the phone very often, but he would never tell him, who he was talking to. He would send Danny to his private room and wouldn't allow him to leave it until he told him so. It was obvious that – whatever he was talking about – it wasn't meant for Danny's ears to hear. But he decided to listen none the less. His brother wouldn't find out about it, he didn't know what Danny was doing in his room, that he was standing behind the door, having an ear pressed to it and listened carefully to what was spoken.

For the first few times he did so, there was nothing interesting to find out about. The phone calls were short and all Rafael would be saying were things like "Yes", "No" or "I'll be there". It wasn't helpful to find out about Rafaels' actions in any way. But Danny was pretty sure that there needed to be more important, more informing calls. Otherwise his brother wouldn't send him away every time he got called. It took some way more than a week and a half, when Danny finally was listening to something that was different from the other calls Rafael held.

"Yeah"

"He... Hello Sir."

"Yes Sir, that's right. What can I do for you?"

"Sure – I can try."

"Yes Sir – you don't need to worry about it."

"No! No, I got nothing to do with it..."

"But Sir, I..."

"Yes of course. There's no need to show me..."

"Yes Sir, I will. I'll be taking care of it."

Rafael ended the call, but Danny wasn't able to move from the door. There was one thing he knew for sure: his brother was in deep trouble. He still wasn't sure what kind of problems he had, but it definitely was the kind of trouble one shouldn't get in. Especially not if he had to take the responsibility for another person – for him to be exact. He just couldn't believe Rafael was acting so carefree. Of course – he was giving him much more free space and didn't put up as many rules as an adult, a care person would've normally done. But Danny deeply believed, that his brother cared for him. And if he did he wouldn't get himself into danger and risk to jeopardize his life too. At least that was what he had believed in, reality spoke a different tone right now.

Danny wouldn't talk to Rafael after that phone call, he just completely ignored him. He wouldn't tell his brother what he was mad about or why. He wouldn't say a single word to him. He was angry at him on the one hand, but on the other couldn't tell him why. Because that would've meant that he had been listening to Rafaels' calls, that he had been spying around, that he had disobeyed to the few rules his brother had made up. He didn't want this to happen. But neither did he want to have anything to do with his irresponsible brother right now.

He had stopped listening to Rafaels' phone calls, but a night – probably a week into the silence between the two – he was woken by a heavy discussion Rafael was having with someone on the phone. He didn't get up from his bed and through the closed door he wouldn't understand the muffled words, but Rafael sounded really, really desperate – and afraid. He was deeply afraid about something. But Danny didn't care. This were his brothers' problems, he had to get along with it! He put the blanket above his head, ignored the talking outside his room and fell asleep once again.

The next morning when Danny got up for school, his brother looked like he hadn't slept for the whole night. His face was pale and his eyes slightly red – he looked awful. He was extremely nervous when he addressed him that morning and Danny was surprised about his statement.

"I want you to stay at home today."

As it had become their normal every day routine, Danny wouldn't answer him. Instead, he got up from the kitchen chair, grabbed his lunch box and was on his way to his room to get his backpack. But Rafael was grabbing him by his arm, holding him back.

"I mean it! You won't leave this house today!"

He had no idea what his brother was so desperate about, but he knew he wouldn't listen to him. He didn't care for his brothers' problems or his reasons to make him stay. He would leave this house, if it fit Rafael's mood or not. It was his decision and he wouldn't allow his irresponsible brother to get in his way. Although this was easier said than done. Rafael wouldn't have any trouble to force him to fulfill the demand. He tried to struggle against his brother, but the grip on his arm would only get harder. Rafael wouldn't let him go – to what reason ever.

"Let go of me!"

"NO! You won't go anywhere today. I want you to stay here and you know I can make you stay if you won't listen to me!"

There it was: Rafael had used his position as the elder one, once again to get his will. Danny was even more angry with him right now, but he stopped struggling against Rafael. It was of no use and he knew that. He would obey to him for the moment. There were other chances to get out of the house than the front door...

"Okay – I'm staying, but let go of me!"

Rafael hesitated for another moment before he slowly loosened the grip on his brother's arm. The desperate expression had vanished from his face and he seemed more relaxed now. Danny wasn't interested to hear what was bothering him. He grabbed his stuff, went to his room and closed the door behind him. Rafael definitely believed this would be where he would stay for the rest of the day. But he was wrong with that.

The fire-ladder leading downstairs to the street directly passed by at the window of his room. He was pretty sure Rafael knew about this, but maybe he had simply forgotten or he didn't believe that his younger brother would dare to disobey against his demands. Whatever reason it was, Danny now had a chance to leave the building. He waited until he could hear the sounds of the TV, Rafael had been turning on, before he opened the window. He wanted to be sure his brother wouldn't hear him. He actually had no problem with staying at home today, he didn't want to go to school. He only did this because his brother had forbidden it to him – Danny wanted to show him that he had no right to decide about what he was doing or not doing. He took his backpack, got out of the window and stepped to the ladder. He was down on the street not even a minute later.

Although he really wasn't interested in going there, he went to school none the less. He had no other place he could think of to go. If he was skipping school, he normally would meet with some friends to spent the day with. He couldn't do that today. Of course – due to Rafael's insistence and the fact that he had missed the bus to school, he arrived there about half an hour too late. But he would only receive reproachful looks for this. Most of his teachers were happy when he appeared at here after all.

As he had expected it, the day was boring as always. But it seemed to proceed faster than on other days. Probably due to the fact that he wanted to be here, that it was his decision and that Rafael couldn't force him.

The only problem about it was, that his brother never should know about this or he would be angry with him for the rest of Danny's life. That meant for him to reenter their flat without being seen or heard.

When he left the school ground and made his way home, he had that awkward feeling that he wasn't alone, that somebody was following him, but each time he turned in paranoia, there was nobody there. He knew that there were some abandoned places with dark corners he had to pass on his way home, but maybe there really was nothing and he simply felt nervous because of disobeying to Rafael.

He had almost reached the backside of the building they lived in, when he finally was about to find out that he had been right. He wasn't alone. Somebody was grabbing him from behind, forcing him to the semi-darkness of a small path between this building and the one directly aside. He was afraid, scared to death all of a sudden. He had no idea who these people were, but living in a neighborhood like this it wasn't really hard to guess what they were about to do with him. He tried to struggle against the hold on his arms, but he wouldn't get free. He tried to slow down his breathing to calm himself – he didn't want these guys to know he was afraid.

"Who the hell are you?"

The man holding him shared a look with his partner and gave him an evil smile.

"A little too cocky, don't you think? Just like his damn brother!"

Danny's thoughts were racing when he heard the words. His brother? Rafael? These people knew Rafael? But what had that got to do with him? What the hell was this all about?

"What the hell do you want from me?"

"It's not exactly you that we want something from. But we need your brother to find out that he can't do whatever he likes – that's what we need you for."

Danny was pretty sure he wouldn't simply be asked to deliver a message. These guys were serious, goddamn serious. They wouldn't let him go this easily. He had no idea what Rafael had done wrong, so they were coming after him, but he knew for sure that it would jeopardize his own safety right here and now. He rapidly looked from one guy to another and held his breath when the taller one of them, the one standing in front of him held a knife in hands all of a sudden. He was struggling more forcefully now and tried to scream for help, but he knew that nobody would hear him. And even if – nobody would care about it. But the guy in front of him seemed to get nervous none the less. He hissed to his partner to keep the hold on Danny, got out his cell phone quickly and dailed a number. Danny was pretty sure to know who he was calling right now.

"Rafael, my dear boy. I just called to let you know something. You better should immediately stop keeping things that don't belong to you. My boss is deeply, deeply angry about that."

He took a step towards Danny and – without any sign of doubt or pity – stabbed him with the knife he held in hands. Feeling the hot flash of pain invading his stomach, Danny could do nothing more but scream out in pain. That definitely was, what these bastards had wanted him to do. They wanted Rafael to hear him scream, to know he was in danger. He couldn't hear what Rafael was saying, but he could hear the man, talking to him, laugh.

"Calm down boy – this was just a warning. But I can assure you: the next time it won't be that simple. You better get rid of that attitude problem of yours. You know you can't run and you can't hide. Wherever you go, you will be found. If we have to come back ever again, your little brother's gonna die!"

Danny was pressing his hands on the bleeding wound – the fluid on his fingers felt strange. He could feel the warmth and the moisture of it which made him feel nauseous. And there was the pain, this steady hot wave of pain that wouldn't go away and left him at the edge of crying. There was nothing he could do against it, but wishing, wishing for the pain to stop.

Obviously Rafael had asked the guy he was on the phone with for where they had captured him, for he could hear him state the address. That was explaining why Rafael had wanted him to stay at home. They didn't know where they were living and therefore they couldn't have harmed him if he would've stayed at home. Rafael had known about this, he had known Danny was in danger, but he wouldn't have said a word, not even a single syllable, nothing. And now Danny had to suffer from the consequences.

Another wave of pain went through him, causing him to hiss in agony. Finally the man holding his arms was letting go of him, but Danny wasn't able to keep himself upright. He fell to his knees and rested his back against the house's brick wall behind him. His vision was getting blurry more and more and finally – with another wave of this unbearable pain – everything went black.

When he woke up again, he was somehow surprised and scared by the different surrounding. A room with white walls, a heavy wooden door in white too, and a glass window besides it. He found himself lying in a bed, covered by white sheets and - as his senses fully came back on him now – a needle stuck to his forehand. This definitely meant he was in a hospital. He breathed in deeply and found himself approved – the smell clearly was the one of a hospital. He had a look to each side of the bed and found that he was all alone. Great! His brother had left him alone once again.

The full memory of the earlier events that day came back on him and anger welt over him as he was clenching his fists. All this shit had just happened because Rafael didn't have the courage to let him know what was going on. This was all his fault!

The door to his room opened and he could see a female doctor, being followed by her guilt ridden brother, who didn't dare to look at him. The doctor gave him a smile and stepped closer to his bed, while Rafael was keeping his distance.

"How do you feel?"

The friendly doctor wanted to know.

"I'm okay, I guess. I feel tired, but that's all."

"That's okay. You have been given pain-killers, so feeling tired is nothing unusual."

A concerned and serious expression appeared on her face when she paused for a second.

"Daniel, I need you to tell me what happened."

It was up to him now to let Rafael pay for his failures. He could easily tell the truth and Rafael definitely would be in a lot of trouble then. But getting his brother into trouble would also mean, that they wouldn't allow him to live with him any longer. He would be forced to leave and would be sent to an orphanage or a foster family. That was the last thing in the world he wanted. But he didn't know if Rafael already had told the doctors a lie about what had happened. He had a look at his brother's desperate face, whose eyes were begging him not to say the truth. He looked at the doctor once again and shrugged slightly.

"I don't remember..."

"You're sure? Your brother told us you were handling a knife in the kitchen. That's where you slipped and fell. Is that what happened, is that the truth?"

He could hear the skeptics in the doctors voice. She didn't buy this story Rafael had told her and – being honest – it was a poor excuse of a story. But he couldn't get his brother into trouble.

"Really – I have no idea. I don't remember. But if he tells you so, I guess it's the truth."

The doctor seemed pretty discontent about this answer, but there was nothing she could do about it. If the teenage boy didn't want to admit the truth she couldn't force him to.

"Alright. I'll be paying a visit to you later on tonight. See how you feel."

Now Rafael finally found his voice once again, though it sounded low and raspy, like he had just lost a pretty deep fear he had been worrying about. That actually was the case, but the doctor didn't know about it. She left the room and closed the door behind her. Rafael still didn't dare to get any closer to his younger brother. He addressed him without looking at him.

"You really okay?"

"I got a goddamn stab wound to my side, Raffi! What the hell do you think how I feel!"

He could see his brother wince by his outburst of emotion. He seemed to feel real guilty, but Danny didn't care about it right at the moment. He had to feel guilty for heaven's sake! This was his fault, his failure!

"Danny, I...I'm sorry,, I'm so deeply sorry. I didn't want this to happen. I didn't want to put you in danger..."

"But you did! That's all that matters to me!"

"Goddamn it, Danny! You wouldn't have gotten into any trouble if you would've done what I said!"

"That's bullshit, Rafael, and you know that! I wouldn't have gotten into danger? Maybe not today, but what about tomorrow or next week or next month? You wanna keep me locked in my room for the rest of my life? So stop telling me that it's my fault! I didn't do anything wrong! I had no idea what the hell you were involved in..."

"I can't tell you! I don't want you to be involved in this..."

"Hello? You see that?"

Danny put up the blanket and pointed to his bandaged side.

"I'm already involved!"

Rafael was slowly shaking his head and then he gave him a deeply sad look. Danny could literally see his brother's heart breaking when he had to keep him out once again.

"Yes. I know you're involved – even more deeply than I ever wanted you to. But I can't tell you anything. These are dangerous, dangerous people and I won't jeopardize your safety any more. I really didn't want this to happen... Please, Danny – don't be angry with me..."

Danny wouldn't answer to his brother's words. He knew Rafael meant what he said. His brother never had been so emotional with him ever before. Not even on the day their parents had died. He was really concerned and sorry about this days' events – Danny knew that. But he was hurt that Rafael was still keeping him at distance none the less. He turned his head from his brother and kept silent.

"Okay, I have to leave now. I'll be seeing you later on tonight... Bye, brother..."

Not a single word parted his lips when his brother turned to leave, hesitated at the door and was finally out of the room.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19:

Jack found his fellow agent in the quiet empty conference room they were frequently using for questioning witnesses or do briefings during investigations. But right now it wasn't needed for anything and Danny had taken some time alone at a quiet place. Jack found him standing at the window, his arms crossed and staring outside. He didn't turn around when Jack entered the room. He rather hadn't heard him or he didn't care. Jack took a few steps towards him and still received no reaction. He wasn't sure where the problem actually was – Danny had been very emotional the last few days – partly aggressive and he had been absent minded. In one word: he hadn't been himself lately and this was influencing the working routine they had. Now Jack had to take care of it to stop and therefore he was here.

"Danny?"

He asked in a soft voice, but his co-worker didn't answer him nor did he turn around – he just didn't react to him.

"I need to talk to you."

Danny still didn't turn around but at last Jack received an answer from him.

"Okay."

"What's wrong?"

Now Danny was turning around and gave him a surprised look, but Jack wouldn't be fooled by that – he knew him too long and too well for this.

"Don't look at me like this."

"Like what?"

"Like you have no idea what I'm talking about. You know damn good what I want to know."

"There's nothing wrong, I'm okay..."

Jack had known this wouldn't be easy. He was sure this had something to do with Joaquin Matthews – with this hispanic, teenage runaway. There was something about him that had caught Danny's attention, had touched him or had reminded him of something and now he had difficulties to stay objective. The only question Jack had, was how absent-minded his fellow agent was and if it would disturb the investigation – if he had gotten himself emotionally involved too much to work. But he also knew Danny wouldn't tell him, he wouldn't want to talk about it, didn't want to talk about personal stuff and Jack hadn't that many chances to force him to. It wasn't his motivation to find out about Danny's problems in detail – it was private and he had no actual right to know about it – he just wanted him to clear his mind and do his job. And if talking about it would help, he would be there for him.

"No, you're not. You have been rude, you have been aggressive and you don't do your job properly. That's not okay..."

"Jack, it's private, okay? So keep out of it – it's none of your business."

" I have to work with you and if you can't do your job properly due to your private problems

it is very well my business!"

"I'm doing my job, Jack! As usual. So would you please shut up now and leave me in peace? That would be great."

Jack rarely had experienced Danny acting like this, that aggressive, that offensive. Something was bothering him – definitely – and it was interfering with his professional duties. Jack – as the superior agent - couldn't tolerate this.

"Alright, as you wish. I won't let you work on this case any longer. You're riding a desk until this case is solved, I don't want you to intervene in this investigation any more."

"Jack..."

"Stop it! I don't wanna hear about it. This is my final decision. You're troubled about

something and as long as you don't get rid of it and still behave like you're doing right now, I don't want you to work in the field with the rest of the team. "

The expression on Danny's face showed pure anger. He probably believed this to be unfair, but Jack didn't care. He knew he was right – for the sake of Joaquin Matthews. He could see Danny swallow hard before he answered – his voice was trembling.

"Alright, fine. As you wish."

He turned from Jack and stormed out of the conference room, leaving him standing there. Jack sighed deeply and slowly left the room.


	20. Chapter 20

A.N.: Hello there – I finally made it back to my computer **and **to my story. I'm so very sorry for letting you wait this long – thanks to everyone who put up with my and still wants to read this.

I have been extremely busy studying during the last couple of weeks, with my final exams fastly approaching… But here I am and you'r e going to receive the rest of the story today – no more delays.

Hope you like it.

Chapter20 :

He could hear him, he was audible through the whole house, probably even their neighbour's house. To hell – the whole neighbourhood of the block could hear him. He had no idea what had caused it – probably there wasn't even a reason. He had just done it, because he was in the mood of doing it – frustrated, aggressive… and drunk. He just hoped and prayed he would stop, stop yelling, stop making his mother cry. He didn't even care about his children waking up and them hearing what he was telling his wife, how he was insulting her.

"Don't you tell me what to do, don't you tell me to be quiet! Not here – not in my own house! You dare telling me what to do in my own house? Who do you think you are? What gives you the right and fucking audacity to talk to me like this?"

He could hear muffled and tear-ridden words, probably his mother's answer.

"I don't give a damn about that! Let them wake up then, so they can hear what kind of a stupid bitch their mother is! You wanna tell me I'm wrong? You wanna tell me I was mistaken? Is this what you believe? Is it? Talk to me goddamn it!"

His mother answered in a low, choking voice.

"The better it is. I don't want you to ever do this again – you have no right to do so, you understand me?"

Now the limit seemed to be exceeded for her – she started to scream at him, too.

"I'm your wife for heaven's sake…"

She didn't get any further for a smacking sound and a yelling at the top of his lungs, stopped her in the midle of the sentence.

"Don't you dare to talk aginst me – shut your fucking mouth! You're damn right, you're my wife – it's your duty and holy promise to respect me! You remember that? You promised to respect me – in a church in front of a priest under the watchful eyes of the lord! Remember that? And now look what you're doing – you call this respect? Answer me!is this respect you're showing to your husband!"

She answered in a low voice again this time.

"You're damn right: it isn't! You won't disrespect me ever again – you hear me! What is it that you're doing for this family that gives you any right to decide what has to be done? Is there anything you do?"

He couldn't hear his mother, so she probably didn't answer to the question.

"Nothing to say? Poor girl! Why am I not surprised? So, thatmeans nothing I guess and that's damn right! You don't pay for this house, you don't feed this family and take care we have a roof above our heads, something to eat and clothes to wear. You don't do anything – so don't you have the arrogance to ever again insist against my actions and decisions! Did you get that?"

From the corner of his eyes and in the semi-darkness of the room, he could see his younger brother moving around in his bed. Finally their father had managed to wake up even him. Rafael had never seen a person sleep that deep and peaceful as his younger brother did, but now their father's screaming had woken him. He seemed to be still partly asleep, but to Rafael's horror, he moved to the edge of the bed and rose. The boy was outta bed and by the door too quick for Rafael to react. He hissed to him in hope to make him stop.

"Daniel – where the hell are you going?"

"Thirsty…"

Was all he received as an answer before the five-year-old managed to slip outside. Rafael hesitated for a moment. He wasn't sure of what to do. He didn't wanna get into trouble with his father and he didn't wanna get hurt, but Danny was his younger brother and it was his responsibility to take care of him and protect him. He was only five years old – he couldn't protect himself from his father's furiousity. He didn't even see the danger emerging for him, if he would go down there right now. Rafael didn't have that much time to think about it – he had to catch Danny before he was down the stairs and out of his range. Because he wouldn't follow him downstairs – as much as he wished to protect his brother, but he wouldn't get close to his father tonight. By all means necessary. He quickly got up from his bed and slipped to the bedrrom door and out to the hall. Danny was already climbing down the stairs. If it wasn't such a threatening situation, Rafael would have smiled. The little boy was damn quick. Rafael rushed to the top of the stairs and hissed after him.

"Danny, come back here – now. You can't go down there right now,…, mom and dad are,…, busy."

He didn't know how to tell him in another way. He din't wanna admit to the five-year-old that their parents were fighting. Although he knew there was no use in trying to keep it from him, his younger brother could hear it as well as he could. But Rafael had achieved his goal at first, Danny had stopped in the middle of the staircase on his way down and turned to face him. He looked worried and still tired.

"What's daddy so mad about?"

"I don't know, Danny. He's just like this – there's nothing that can help that…"

"So, mommy hasn't done anything wrong."

He sounded amazed and surprised by the fact that somebody could be angry without a reason. He was a child – he deeply believed that there was a reason for people hurting each other, it just couldn't be true to him that they just did because they currently liked to. Something must be wrong, if people were fighting, but it wasn't the case. Desperation welled over Rafael.

"He's just drunk – don't think about it. Come back upstairs!"

Danny seemed to somehow have lost the interest in the materia. That was another abilitie of children of his age – they easily managed to change the subject and completly forget about something that had been managed before.

"I'm still thirsty. Don't you worry, I'm back in a second. Noone will see me."

Rafael rushed down the stairs halfway, but his little brother was quicker than him. He was already down the stairs and on the way to the kitchen. Rafael sat down on the stairs and covered his face with his hands. He knew this wouldn't end good, he just knew it. Something would happen down there, they would see Danny, their father would see him and than the little boy would get hurt. He desperately hissed his brother's name once again, but he knew it was of no use.

"Daniel, come back!"

Than he just sat there quietly and waited, waited for the inevitable to happen. The shattering of glass made him wince and curse silently. Daniel had dropped something down there in the kitchen and to Rafael's horror his father suddenly had stopped yelling. The next thing he heard were steps flying into the direction of the kitchen. He could see his father cross the floor with a furiou expression on his face and his mother right behind him, crying and upset. There were a few seconds of deadly silence, before his father yelled once again, but this time he didn't scream at their mom.

"What the hell are you doing down here?"

Rafael couldn't hear any answer from his brother – he probably was halfway scared to death by his father's sudden outburst.

"What's your problem – boy? I asked you a question – answer me!"

Now he could hear his mother's calm, but still shacky voice, trying to soothe her youngest son.

"You're supposed to be in bed, Daniel."

But he didn't even get a chance to answer for his father was yelling at his wife once again now.

"Don't you interrupt me when I'm talking! I'm having a conversation with my son here and I want you to keep your damn mouth shut!"

His father stepped closer to him and Rafael could hear the glass scratching above the ground when he picked it up. His voice was more quiet, but extremely threatening now.

"Look what you've done!"

Danny seemed to take his courage now.

"I,…, I'm sorry – I just wanted to have something to drink, I,…, I was thirsty. I didn't mean to…"

Before his father was able to react, his mother had insisted once again, her voice sounded so lovely and understanding.

"That's okay, honey. It's okay. I'll get you something."

The next thing Rafael would hear was a smacking sound and his mother crying out loudly.

"Didn't I tell you to keep quiet, goddamn it! What's so difficult about that. I told you not to dare to interrupt me again! And look, I'm still talking… Shut up now, all for once, or I'll forget myself…"

This time Danny took a chance to answer, better said to ask a question and when Rafael heard his words he knew the situation was done – his father would completely lose himself to his temper and anger. Danny wasn't to blame – he was just a child, naïve and carefree. But it were Rafael's earlier explanations that made the situation far worse.

"Why are you so mad at mommy? You drunk?"

Rafael clenched his wrists, still sitting on the stairs and silently prayed.

"Good lord – no. you didn't do that…"

His father voice was much too calm when he responded to his son's question.

"What did you just say?"

Before his mother had a chance to calm him or Danny could repeat his words or tell him he was sorry, for whatever he had done wrong, Rafael could hear the shattering of glass once again. It happened all too quick. The next sound ringing in his ears, was his little brother crying out in intense pain and his mom hysterically swearing in panic.

"Good lord! What are you doing? He's bleeding, he's injured! You hurt him You hurt your son! You stupid, supersticious, godforsaken, drunken bastard! Look what you've done. Get out of here! Get out of here immediately or I'll call the police! I don't wanna see you here again tonight! I don't care how you do it, but you won't spend the night in this house! Leave! Now!"

His mother's voice was flipping over and she was that furious, desperate, upset and hysterical, that she seemed to manage to fear their father. He didn't insist against her, he didn't yell at her and he didn't hit her. He just turned and left the house head over heels. She really seemed to have scared him.

Now that his father was gone, Rafael dared to get down the stairs completely and sneak into the kitchen. His mom had kneeled down in front of Danny, who was crying and she had wrapped a towel around his wrist. Rafael could see the blood. His younger brother was heavily bleeding – their father had probably cut him with the shattered bottle.

"Mom?"

He managaed to whisper. She didn't even wince by his words and she didn't turn around. She was completely focused on her crying, injured child, talking to him silently in a soothing tone.

"It's okay, babe – everything's okay. Don't you cry, don't you worry. It's gonna be okay, mommy's gonna make it be okay. Shhh, stop crying – it's all good."

Without turning to him, she gave out orders to her elder son.

"Rafael, I want you to go to the Sanchez home, ask Luisa to come over, tell her I need her help. She's a nurse she can help us."

"Okay mom."

Rafael was already out the backdoor when she saw her mother grabbing her youngest son, holding him in her arms and going upstairs to probably get him back to his bedroom.

Rafael was running down the strret of the neighbourhood, to the Sanchez house, almost at the end of it and forcefully knocked at the front door. A tired, muffled voice could be heard from inside.

"Who's this?"

"It's Rafael, Mr. Sanchez. I need to talk to your wife, it's really important."

"Do you know what time it is boy! Come back tomorrow."

"NO! I can't, you don't understand. My mother sended me here, she needs your wifes help. My brother – he's hurt. She needs you at our place now."

All of a sudden there was movement behind the door. Mr. Sanchez called for his wife and opened the door on him. He looked pretty concerned.

"What happened boy."

Rafael knew his mother didn't want the neighbourhood to know about the things going on in their private life, so he lied.

"I don't know, but please hurry. We need your help."

Luisa Sanchez grabbed her overcoat and rushed behind Rafael, who already was in running back down the street. She was breathing at the top of her lungs when they entered the kitchen backdoor and wasn't able to speak for a few moments.

"Mom we're back, Mrs. Sanchez is here with me."

He yelled into the hall of the house. Then he explained to Mrs. Sanchez.

"They're upstairs, in our bedroom. That's the first door left."

Luisa hurried upstairs and entered the bedroom, Rafael was close behind her. His mother was still holding Danny in her arms, trying to calm him. The towel wrapped around his hand and forearm had become deeply red.

"Good lord – what happened."

"He,…, he was injured…"

"I see that – how did it happen.?"

His mother didn't answer the question and Luisa didn't seem willing to ask any further. She sat down beside his mom and took his brother's arm.

"Let me see boy – don't you worry. I won't hurt you."

Before she had a look at the injury, she turned to Rafael.

"I want you to get me some bandages and some antibacerial wash. Hurry, boy."

He rushed out of the room and into the bathroom, where he grabbed the things Luisa needed. He could hear his brother's muffled cry while he was looking for the stuff. She probably had taken of the towel. He finicshed collecting the things and rushed back to their bedroom, but Luisa didn't allow her to stay. So he stood in front of the bedroom door and pressed an ear against it, to hear what the two women were talking about.

"That's all I can do for you, but it's a deep cut and it's heavily bleeding. You should go to hospital and see a doctor…"

"No! I,…, I can't. They would ask questions…"

"And what would you tell them?"

"Stop it, Luisa – I can't tell them, I can't tell anybody. This are our problems, we have to get along with that. I don't want anyone to get involved…"

"He hurt your son – a five year old child…"

"He didn't mean to, he was drunk."

"Excuse me, but that's bullshit! He knew all too well what he was doing and he did it none the less. You need help!"

"He's a good husband!"

"No, no he's not! He yells at you, he insults you, he huurts you and he hurts your children. Go to hospital – talk to a doctor and talk to social work. They will help you."

"I,…, I can't. you don't understand – I'm his wife, I swore to stay by his side and I love him. I can't leave him…"

"Even if that means you're endangering your children?"

His mother didn't answer to this question and he already knew the answer and he was deeply furious about it.

She would stay by his side – whatever consequences would be emerging from it and even if it would endanger them – their children.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21:

When Jack entered the office the next morning, he was pretty late and he was still angry about the events occurring last night, still angry about Danny and his attitude towards him. He knew it would be difficult working together, but he had no other chance and he knew he had been right with his decision. He couldn't allow Danny to work in the field right now and he wouldn't, even if that meant his fellow agent would be mad at him.

He decided to get to his private office, but a gaze into the bureau's room made him change his mind. He frowned by what he saw: Danny's desk was still empty. He entered the room and went to Sam, who was standing at a conference table, flipping through some files and different documents. He didn't even take the time to greet her good morning and made her wince and abruptly turn around when he addressed her.

"So, where's Danny this morning?"

Sam didn't like the tone in Jack's voice – he sounded so sweet, so extremely friendly he almost managed to scare her. Something must've happened between him and Danny, probably they had been fighting and from the tone in Jack's voice it had been a very bad discussion. So she tried to be careful when she answered his question.

"He won't be at work today. He called in sick."

"Really? Did he then? Didn't look so sick to me when he left yesterday night."

Sam gave him a look that made clear his behavior was childish and not even slightly productive. There definitely had been some deeper conflict and Jack seemed to be hurt about something Danny had said to him, otherwise he wouldn't act like this. She felt like there was some need to talk about it or Jack would be unbearable for at last the rest of the day if not even longer and she didn't wanna work with him when he behaved like this.

"What are you so sour about, what happened?"

He seemed to decide to close in on her question in first place, but finally his face's expression got softer and he sighed silently.

"I'm not completely sure about it myself. I told him he had to lose that attitude problem of his if he wanted to go on working in this case, but he just closed in and claimed he was okay… So I removed him from this case and wanted him to ride a desk for the rest of the week."

Sam nodded to show him she understood, but she didn't say anything. She hadn't been present when they had been talking, so she had no right to judge about Jack's decisions, if she disliked them or not. And she was pretty sure there was something else he wanted to tell her, so she just kept quiet.

"Something had troubled him, I just don't know what it was and he didn't wanna talk about it. He told me to stay out of it and that it was none of my business."

"And then he left?"

"Yeah."

"Without another word of resistance?"

"Yeah."

"And now he calls in sick and won't come to work?"

"Yeah."

"That's not good, Jack. It definitely isn't!"

"Yeah, I know…"

""Maybe you should call him, talk to him – clear your problems?"

He gave her a look of sympathy.

"Yeah –maybe."

She stepped aside and offered him a seat at her desk.

"Call right now."

She demanded and Jack – after having another look in her eyes, that wouldn't tolerate the word "no" right now – sat down and dialed Danny's private number. Sam could see the impatience rise on his face – and the concern. He let the phone ring – six times, seven times, but nobody would answer it. Jack put down the phone.

"He rather isn't at home or he doesn't want to answer the phone. I can't reach him."

Sam didn't know what to say about it. She couldn't believe that – just because he was angry about Jack's decision – Danny wouldn't answer the phone. He was professional, he wouldn't do that. There must've been some different reason. Jack's words drew her attention back to reality.

"When did he call in?"

"About an hour ago."

Jack seemed to hesitate for a moment – thinking about the decision he was about to make.

"Would you track down the call for me, please?"

It wasn't a question, it was a demand, an order. But she insisted none the less. She just couldn't believe he really meant what he said.

"Jack!"

"Track the call – Samantha! I need to know from where he was calling – where he was going to."

"So you believe he left town?"

"I don't believe it, I know it."


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22:

Danny had been mad at Jack about his decision to throw him out of the case. Of course he was still working on it, but he wouldn't be in the field, wouldn't really help to find Joaquin Matthews. That was what really bothered him – he felt connected to that boy, due to his own past and that was what caused the desperate wish to help and find the boy.

But he also knew Jack had been right. He hadn't been himself lately. He had been emotionally involved, had been aggressive and – as Jack had told him – it had been interfering with his work. It couldn't go on like that. With the attitude problem, the personal problem he had right now he'd rather endanger Joaquin more than he would help him. He needed to get rid of his personal trouble, needed to finally get along with his past and there was only one way, one chance and one place he could do this at.

He had decided to leave town for a few days and not to tell anyone where he was going to. He needed some private time, needed to be alone and he didn't want any of his co-workers, especially not Jack, to get involved. He needed to sort this out on his own – this was his problem.

So he had packed some things and had left town early at about four in the morning. He had planned to stay away from the city and from work for at least three days and he had decided to call in sick. He knew that – of course – Jack wouldn't buy that, but he didn't want to give him the satisfaction to take some days off and admit he had been right with his believe that there was a problem. Natural pride really seemed to sometimes be a problem!

He had taken the interstate south and he knew he would be on his way almost all day long, but he didn't dare to fly. He was pretty sure Jack would be furious enough when he found out he had lied to him about being sick and had left town, that he would check the payments on his credit card. So he had no chance to fly down to Miami. He had to go there by car. But the hours and hours of driving were worth it and he had the chance to once again think about what he actually wanted to do down there. He knew he had to come clean with his past, but he wasn't really sure where to start and what to do. What he had the most courage for.

He knew he had to talk to all those people he had hurt, while he had been still living down there. He needed to talk to his former social worker: Julie, he needed to talk to his foster-family: the Stevensons and he had decided to visit his parents grave. He had to come clean with his past. As painful as it would be, but there was no other chance to get back his objectivity for the cases he was working on. He needed to get a hold on his emotional troubles – here and now.

In the FBI's missing person's bureau in New York the situation was tense. Sam had obeyed to Jack's order to track down the call Danny had made when he had called in sick for today, but she was absolutely disliking what she had been forced to do and she didn't hide it when she entered Jack's private office right now to inform him. Her arms were crossed before her chest, her faces' features were hard and her voice was cold and restrained as she addressed him, still standing in the door-frame and unwilling to come in.

"They tracked down the call."

Jack looked up at her and tried to ignore her dislike about his methods, he was using right now. But he couldn't hide his interest from her.

"And?"

"It was a cell-phone call probably held from somewhere between Philly and D.C. They couldn't track down the area any closer, the call was too short…"

She turned to leave the office quickly, as Jack responded to her information once again.

"So he has left town – going south. I'm really interested in his explanation for this!"

She couldn't hide her anger any longer and turned around to face him.

"You throw him out of the case, you tell him to take care of his problems and now that he's leaving to probably get some time of his own to think it over or even do what you asked him to, you're getting mad at him! What the hell is it that you expect him to do?"

"I expect him to behave like an adult, to be professional! He can't just lie to me and leave town, just because he's mad at me. He's no child any more – he's grown up – he has responsibilities…"

"You just took his responsibilities of him yesterday evening when you threw him out!"

"That's not true! Whatever! What makes you so sure he's trying to get a hold on his problems and is not just bathing in his anger about the fact that I removed him from the case?"

Sam calmed her voice and gave him a bittersweet smile.

"The fact that he's grown-up, that he cares about his responsibility and that he's professional."

She turned and left the office before he had another chance to react to her words.

He had been driving all day – feeling tired and hungry from time to time, but he wouldn't stop. He had some stuff to eat in the car and he would only stop for refilling the car with gas. He couldn't stop, couldn't allow himself to rest and start to think his decision over. He was pretty sure he would just turn the car and head back home if he thought about it once again. So he just skipped that part and drove ever on and on. He was getting along pretty well and when he finally reached his hometown, his birthplace in Florida it was just about to get dark at about 9 pm in the evening.

He knew there was nothing he could do today any more – it was too late to visit social care, the Stevensons or the town's grave-yard, so he got himself a hotel room for the night and after settling down the few things he had taken with him, fell into a deep, dreamless sleep for this night.

Sam decided to leave the office at about half past nine this evening. The tension between her and Jack – the coldness – hadn't disappeared and she just wished to leave this place as soon as possible to not have to deal with him any longer today. But she didn't get the chance to leave the bureau as she had liked to. He was calling her.

"Sam – wait a sec!"

He approached at her and gave her a smile full of sympathy.

"May I talk to you?"

She couldn't keep the coldness from her voice.

"If it's absolutely necessary."

He invited her to follow him into his private office and gently closed the glass door behind him. As she turned to face him, she received an apologizing smile.

"Maybe you were right…"

He announced quietly. She knew what he was talking about – at least she was pretty sure, but she wanted to hear from him.

"About what?"

He knew she was just forcing him to tell. But he was the one who had been fighting with her, he was the one who probably had been wrong – so she had all the right in the world to behave like that.

"About Danny and his disappearance – maybe he actually did skip town to get a hold on his emotional troubles."

"Yeah, maybe… So you wanna give him the time to come clean?"

"Yeah – I guess I will."

Now she finally gave him a smile.

"That's good… - I'll see you tomorrow."

And then she left him standing alone in his private office to finally get home tonight.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23:

Finally – after trying to call someone at immigration for three times and never getting a hold on the superior agent in charge – Jack had managed to get an appointment, so he could pay a visit to one of the agents at immigration. It had taken him more than a day to finally get a hold on them and now, that he was standing in the office of the agent in charge, new problems were occurring.

"Matthews? I don't believe we ever had to take care of someone named Matthews."

"Well – it's not his real birth name. It's the name of his foster parents. We already talked to social care and his social worker told us, his parents last name was Mantego. Hopefully you got someone with that name?"

The agent he was talking to frowned and gave him a miserable look. He didn't seem to be willing to take care of this, didn't want to be disturbed. But he turned around to his computer and searched for a match none the less. The agent was drumming on the desk with his fingers while the computer was searching for a result. Finally it spilled out a number of matches.

"15 matches concerning the name Mantego. Be happy his name wasn't Sanchez or Cortez – you would've been searching forever and ever then. So, what was the boy's first name?"

"Joaquin."

The agent changed the searching routine and gave the name to the program. Again the computer started searching and some seconds later it beeped once again. Jack could see the result of the search, standing directly behind the agent from immigration now: One match found.

The agent clicked to the searching results and received a number – probably the number of the file they were searching for. He turned around to Jack.

"You wanna have a look inside?"

Jack nodded and the agent got up from his chair to search for the file. He guided Jack out of his private office and told him to wait at the foyer of the bureau until he had found the file. It took him about 20 minutes and when he finally came back with the file, without a word of apology, slight annoyance was visible on Jack's face. Maybe he was just a little paranoid, but he believed the agent from immigration could have taken much less time to come back with the file. But he hadn't been willing to. He didn't want to help, finding Joaquin Matthews. It was his job to get rid of the illegal immigrants entering this country and if one of them disappeared, although he – technically – was a native American, what did he care? Joaquin Matthews – one of the immigrants he hadn't been able to send back, had vanished. Jack had the slight impression that the agent actually was glad about this outcome – out of sight, out of mind. He didn't give a damn about Joaquin – not the slightest bit. But at least he had been halfway polite – he had searched the file for him, that would hopefully answer a few of his questions. The agent from immigration slightly waved with the file and gave Jack a fake smile.

"There it is."

"May I take this with me?"

The expression on the other agent's face stated complete negation, but he just seemed to realize who he was talking to and that made him put on a fake smile once again.

"That's not up to me to decide. You'll have to talk to my superior if you wish to take the file with you."

Jack had expected something like this. Not – that this already was the third time he had tried to reach someone at immigration, not that they maybe had information in that godforsaken file that were essential for them. But nobody at this place seemed to be willing to help – bureaucracy was flipping all over. The one thing that they didn't have here – that they had in no case of a missing person – was time. The longer Joaquin Matthews would stay disappeared, the harder it was getting to find him. He didn't have the time to cope with this.

"Let me have a look inside right now, then. It's really important."

Jack believed to see a smile on the other man's face. Like he was content he had won this little fight with the superior federal agent.

"As you wish."

The agent from immigration took a different direction this time, leading him to one of the conference rooms of the bureau. He opened up the door for him and let him step inside, handing him the file while he did so.

"How much time will you need?"

"I don't know, yet. Depends on what I'll find."

Another shrug from the man standing opposite to him.

"Well – take your time then. I'll be in my office – you can hand the file back as soon as you're ready."

"Thanks."

The agent didn't say anything else, but closed the door behind him and left Jack alone with the file in his hands. He sat down and opened it up.

It stated the names of Joaquin's corporal parents: Diego and Rosa Mantego. So it was the right file at least. He skipped through the pages and found the information approved, which Vivian and Martin had received from Joaquin's social worker. His parent's had died in a plane crash when he was about 12 and he – as being born in the U.S. and therefore a native American – couldn't have been sent out of the country. He had been taken to social-care and they had found a foster family for him. The file also stated – in a handwritten note – that Joaquin had stayed out of any trouble. Which probably would have been a reason to get him out of the country.

All this stuff were things he already knew – they wouldn't help them. He had hoped to find out something new, something essential, something that would finally lit a new light on this case, but there was no information he hadn't already heard about.

He was just about to give up in desperation, when he decided to take another chance and went through the file another time. This time he found it – some useful information. He found a handwritten page with the headline saying – family's relatives. There it was, the information he had been searching for. The one thing they hadn't known by now and that would be a reason for Joaquin to leave. An information that would explain his sudden disappearance. There was a name written on this piece of paper:

Anna Mantego, born Oct. 17th 1980, daughter, current residence: Baja, Mexico.

Joaquin had a sister, a living family member. She probably had been send away when their parents had died, for she had been born in her parent's home country. She hadn't been allowed to stay. From what the class-teacher had said, Joaquin was deeply troubled about himself and his own identity. Who was he supposed to go to, to ask for help, if not a family member? The sister was the one thing they hadn't known anything about up to now. At least it was a proper chance.

Jack scribbled down the information about Joaquin's sister and closed the file. He flipped his cell-phone open and dailed Vivian's number. She and Martin were with the Matthews right now and he wanted them to question them about Joaquin's sister. Did they know about her? Had he ever been talking about her? He could hear the ringing of the phone and then Vivian's voice was audible after the second time.

"Johnson?"

"Viv, this is Jack. I need you to talk to the Matthews once again."

"What about?"

"I just flipped through Joaquin's file at immigration and I found out that he has a sister. His only still living relative..."

"You believe, that's where he was running to?"

"I guess it's a reasonable chance. I just want you to ask them if he ever spoke about her. Maybe she called or wrote him, maybe there was any kind of contact that would approve my suspicion."

"I'll see what I can find out."

"Thanks, Viv. Keep me posted."

He hung up the phone, took the file from the table and headed back to the agent – who had offered him the conference room to go through the file – and hand him the file. As he had told him, he was in his office, talking on the phone when he entered. He didn't seem to be surprised to see Jack so soon once again and the expression on his face clearly stated that he didn't believe the file's information had been useful.

"I'll call you back, later."

He mumbled into the phone, hung up and then took back the file Jack had gone through. He placed it on his desk and gave him an innocent look.

"You found anything?"

"Yes, actually."


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24 :

He was afraid – not really deeply scared, but it was enough to leave an awkward, uncomfortable feeling. He didn't feel good and he started to doubt. Doubted if this was actually the right thing to do, if it was really necessary to come clean with the demons of his own past. He simply wasn't sure about what he was doing right now, was a good idea. It had been a tough decision and it was a hard thing to fulfill the demands he had set for himself. But he was here now, he had taken the long ride down here. It wouldn't make any sense to just turn around and leave now – he already had invested too much in this.

Weakness – or the believe of being weak had been a constant fear to him, since the day his parents had died. The responsibility he had felt about their death never had vanished – it was still there. He had the feeling it almost had gotten worse through the years of silent suffering. He never had told anyone, never had talked to anyone about it, had kept it secret and had given the feelings he had about this one miserable day of his childhood the chance to grow inside of him and finally take over his emotional reaction. That's what had happened when this quarterback from high school had started to insult Joaquin. That's what had been responsible for his mistakes – the boy had reminded him that much of himself and his own fate as a teenager, that he hadn't been able to stay objective.

He needed this time-out. Needed the chance to listen to himself, to his own heart and find out how he could help the situation. It couldn't go on this way – Jack had been right with that. This wouldn't be the last case about a missing teenager with a similar fate than his and he couldn't afford to lose control every time such a case would occur again. He had to come clean – there was no other reasonable chance.

He couldn't even recall when he had visited his parents' graves for the last time, he honestly didn't know. He hadn't been able to attend the funeral, for the doctors in hospital wouldn't allow him to go there. They had demanded he'd stay for at least a week of observation, so they could be absolutely sure he was alright. Of course he had insisted – he had cursed and cried. He had wished – although he knew he was responsible and probably had no right to wish for it – to see his parents for one last time. But he hadn't been able to, hadn't been able to say goodbye.

Rafael and Erika several times had offered him to pay his parents a visit, to join him if he wanted to go there. But right at that time he didn't find the courage to do so. He had been afraid, he would just break down and cry and would confess the whole truth about the accident to his brother or sister. He had been afraid they would find out it was his fault and then they would send him away. He didn't want to be all alone – he needed the rest of his family to soothe him and take care of him. He couldn't go there – he just couldn't. And as time proceeded Erika got more busy with her job and Rafael got addicted to drugs, there was no one who would join him on this difficult task. And as a teenager who had just lost – no, killed – his parents, he didn't have the courage to go there on his own.

Nightmares had been occurring at this time. Flashes and memories of his dead parents and their lifeless faces. Dreams about his brothers and sisters finding out about the truth and turning their back on him. And at the worst nights he had dreams of his dead parents blaming him for what he had done. He knew they were all right, but he couldn't help it. He was crying about it and tried to fight the tiredness, tried to stay awake, for he was scared to death to fall asleep and dream again.

But when Rafael had been taken into custody by police and he had been transferred to a foster family, the dreams stopped. He would have dreamless nights and nobody would be there to haunt him, when he closed his eyes. He exactly knew why: he had been punished, he finally had received what he deserved for his failure. He had been taken from his family, the family he still had, and they wouldn't allow him to go back. So instead of being afraid and of dreaming about the blame they would give to him, he grew angry. He had been so angry about his fate, about his current situation and about himself, that nobody around him would get along with him. That's what had destroyed the relation to the Stevensons. Maybe there had been a chance for them to break through his defense and be good foster parents for him, but he wouldn't allow them so. He never would've let them in, never would've let them known what he had been so angry about.

This was almost 15 years ago and he was still blaming himself. He was still afraid from time to time and he was still angry. He always had believed that he couldn't help that, that it came naturally. But the Matthews-case had showed him that it didn't. That there was a deeper reason for all this and that there was at least a small chance to change the feelings he had. To finally bury them, along with all his bad memories about things he shouldn't be feeling responsible for.

He had decided to visit the grave-yard in the morning. It was the one situation he feared most, so he had to do this first, otherwise he would never do it. And although he had slept surprisingly well this night, he felt sick and tensed when he got into his car this morning. He knew it wasn't a physical problem. His psyche was playing tricks on him, affecting his body. But he would stay strong this time – would be stubborn – he wouldn't turn back, wouldn't leave today. He had decided to do this and therefore he would – end of story.

Flashes of memories suddenly occurred – his father yelling, his mother screaming by the sight of the truck and his own never ending fear as he realized what would be happening. He forcefully shook his head to get rid of the thoughts and told himself he needed to focus and that he wouldn't give up on himself this time. And for the moment it worked.

When the cemetery got into sight, his awkward feeling of sickness and fear grew more and more. He had expected this to happen, had known he couldn't keep his feelings at bay when it came to his parents death. Even after all those years. Even on the distance of some hundred miles he had been disturbed in his emotions by the past events and now – only having a few meters of distance between – his emotions seemed barely controllable.

He parked the car asides the entrance to the grave-yard and got out of it, taking some moments to calm down and concentrated on breathing, saying himself, that he could do this, that he needed to.

He entered the grave-yard and – although he hadn't been here for years – he exactly knew where he had to go to. It was like everything happened automatically. And while he was walking, getting closer and closer to the space his parents were buried at, the memory of the last and only time he had been here before came back on him.

It had been the night when Julie had told him he would leave town. The night she had told him she would send him to New York City and that he wouldn't come back here again. He had been afraid, he had been desperate and there had been a million things going through his mind about what to do now. He had come up with the idea of running away, but – being realistic – he knew that was no option. Police would find him and take him back and he would have to go to New York either way. He had no chance to get any of his brothers or sisters to take care of him. He wished to talk to someone to advice him what to do, but he couldn't think of anyone he was close enough with. He finally had realized that he had no options. As angry as he was about it, he couldn't prevent the events that would occur tomorrow. He would be send away to N.Y.C no matter what. That's when - in frantic desperation – he thought about the things he wished to do before he had to leave his hometown - the place he had been born at - for at least an eternity of time, until he would be old enough to decide on his own, what he wanted to do. The first thing that came to his mind, thinking about what he needed to do, was visiting his parents. He hadn't done it once in the four years since they died and he couldn't leave without finally saying goodbye to them.

He had gone to the grave-yard and had asked one of the guards for his parents graves, for he had never been there before and he had described the way for him, after he had disagreed to be guided there. He needed to do this on his own. He didn't want anybody to see him here. His feelings seemed normal to him, up until the moment the gravestone with his parents' names on it came to his sight. He completely had lost control, no more able to control his emotional reaction. He had simply fallen to his knees right in front of the gravestone and had started to cry. He couldn't stop himself from doing it, he couldn't do anything about it. It just happened and it felt like he would never ever stop doing it again. Like he would sit here on his knees for the rest of his life and would cry for his parents and for his own miserable life.

He must've spent more than an hour there – although he didn't feel the time proceeding and didn't care about the sun going down – when the guard, who was about to take a last control-round before he closed the gates, found him still in the same position. He had asked him, if he was okay and Danny had stopped crying immediately, not wanting anyone to see his tears. But he hadn't been able to answer the question. The guard had helped him to his feet and had guided him to the entrance gate, where he asked him if he should take him home. Danny had only managed to shake his head no and had gotten to the Stevensons house, getting to bed without being seen by them. He didn't want to talk to them, didn't want to hear their explanations and apologies about why they sent him away, didn't want to explain why he had been crying. He just lay down to sleep and this night – the nightmares appeared once again.

Today – almost 15 years later – Danny was following the path to his parent's grave once again. He had matured, had grown up, had experienced things in life. But he was still afraid. He stepped away from the paved path and into the green grass, finally stopping in front of the grave-stone he had last seen as a teenager. This time he managed to kneel down there in a more controlled way than the last time he had been at this place, but none the less he felt a slight trembling in his legs. He reached out a hand and touched the names carved into the stones. A slight smile crossed his face – a sad one and only for a second.

"Hey Mom. Hey Dad."

He managed to whisper and somehow felt slightly stupid in doing so. They were dead for heaven's sake! They no longer could hear him. But he just couldn't stop. He needed to talk to them, needed to tell them how much he had deeply cared about them, how much he had loved them, how much he still did. He wasn't here to defend himself – he couldn't change anything about the accident any more. But he wanted them to know, what he had never been able to tell them. Wanted them to hear all the things he never got the chance to tell them. And if that meant that he had to talk to a grave-stone he would do it. He wasn't sure they could hear him, but he was sure it would help. So he talked – talked about all the things still bothering his heart after all those years.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25:

Vivian ended the phone call with Jack and went back to the living room, which she had left just a minute ago to have some privacy while talking to Jack. Now she entered the room once again and gave a sign to Martin to come over to her. Then she addressed the Matthews in an apologizing tone.

"Would you excuse us for some more moments, please?"

She received a nod to her question from Mr. Matthews and guided Martin out of the room.

"What is it?"

"I have been talking to Jack. He has gone through Joaquin's file at immigration and he found out about a still living relative. It occurs that he has a sister, who had been transferred to Mexico. Jack believes they had been in contact and that he maybe disappeared because he wanted to pay her a visit. He wants us to question the Matthews if they know anything about her."

Martin nodded approvingly and the two went back to the living-room to interview the Matthews for a second time.

"Mr. and Mrs. Matthews – there is something else we need to ask you about..."

Vivian started the conversation and immediately received a concerned look from Mrs. Matthews. She tried to sound assuring and soothing when she went on.

"It's nothing bad. I just wanted to know if Joaquin ever talked about his corporal family."

The couple shared a look and Mr. Matthews answered the question. There was a hard, hurt tone in his voice.

"He has been talking about them all the time for the last couple of weeks, although we had agreed not to do so. But he wouldn't follow to our agreement."

"So – what exactly did he tell you?"

Mrs. Matthews took head of the conversation now, holding a sad expression on her face.

"Nothing in particular – actually. He just told us about them, because he wanted to hurt us, wanted to make clear, that we weren't - and never would be - his real parents, as much as we would try. "

"So he hasn't told you anything about his familiar background, his former living conditions – stuff like that?"

"No, nothing like that. He just told us, how wonderful they had been, how much they had cared for him and how much he had loved them. That they were the only real parents he ever had and that we would never achieve the same state in his life that they had..."

"I'm sorry..."

Vivian stated her empathy and Martin had another, the essential question for the couple.

"Did he ever mention a sister?"

"A sister? No, never. We didn't know he had any more living relatives! He has a sister?"

"Yes, he has. She's named as his only living relative and we assume that maybe he was trying to get in contact with her..."

"Did you ever scan his room? Did he receive letters from someone you didn't know?"

"No, we never scanned through his private stuff and as far as I know – he didn't receive any letters. But how can we be a hundred percent sure about that? We weren't even close enough to him to foresee he would run away."

"You shouldn't blame yourself – you haven't done anything wrong. May we have a look at his room? Maybe we'll find something."

"Is that really necessary? This is his privacy..."

"It may help us to find out where he has gone to or at least why he disappeared. I believe that's in favor with your wishes?"

"Okay, if you believe it may help you find him, I won't disagree. I only want to have him back and I want him to be healthy!"

Mrs. Matthews got up from the couch and guided them upstairs to Joaquin's room. She opened the door and allowed them to step inside.

"You will tell us if you find anything, won't you?"

"Sure, Mrs. Matthews – we will."

After she had left, the two federal agents started to scan Joaquin's private room. There was nothing special about it, it looked like any other messed up room of a 16 year old teenager. But somewhere in here, there must be a hint to solve this case and find the boy. Their only task was to find it.

They searched silently for about half an hour, when Martin finally addressed Vivian with slight excitement in his voice.

"Viv?"

She turned around and spotted the metal box he held in his hands.

"What is it?"

He opened it up and showed the envelope of a letter to her. She couldn't read the small handwritten words on the distance, but he told her.

"Anna Mantego, Baja Mexico. He was in contact with his sister!"

"I'm gonna call Jack. Would you please get down to inform the parents? Tell them we have to take the box with us."

Vivian could hear Martin step down the stairs as she flipped her phone open and dialed Jack's number.

"Malone?"

"This is Viv. You were right. Joaquin has been in contact with his sister – we just found a box filled with letters she has written to him. I don't know about the content yet, but I'll take the letters with me and we gonna find out."

"Alright, good work. We'll met at the office. Let's hope this is the connection we've been searching for."

She said goodbye and ended the call. She stepped down the stairs and assured the Matthews once again, that they would inform them as soon as they found out anything about Joaquin and then said goodbye. She and Martin headed back to the office.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26:

Danny entered the familiar building of social care to find the one person who could give him the connection to his past. Give him the chance to appologize for it, to finally cope with his childhood days and get over it.

He walked down the floor in search of the room where Julie Neveal – his former social worker – had her office, when a young woman crossed his path, gave him a smile and stopped.

"Can I hep you?"

"Yeah, hopefully. I'm searching for Mrs. Neveal?"

"Julie? That's the third door on the right."

"Thanks."

"No problem."

The woman turned around and walked away from him. He breathed in deeply and walked up the floor. When he reached the door he was supposed to knock at, he wasn't sure if this was the right thing to do. He hesitated and he could feel slight fear well up inside of him. Maybe this was wrong or childish or ... He didn't have enough words for what it could also be. He just knew he wasn't sure about this. He shook his head an tried to focus. He was only here to do this, had taken a few days off and had travelled a long way to do it. He wouldn't leave without entering this office now. He knocked and waited.

"Enter."

He opened the door, stepped inside and smiled to the woman behind the desk. Julie was older, but still beautiful – her face looked more mature and her hair was already showing grey marks, but she still radiated the same courage, strength, calmness and sympathy she always had. It was her – no doubt about this. Her voice sounded surprised when she addressed him.

"What can I do for you?"

"You're Julie Neveal?"

"Yes exactly – and you are?"

"You once told me not to come back before I managed to finish school, get a job and live my life. It has taken some time – but here I am..."

She hesitated a few seconds and silence fell between them. Then her face seemed to somehow enlighten and a smile appeared on her lips.

"Daniel Alvarez?"

He just smiled back and nodded before he answered her question.

"Yeah."

The smile stayed on her face, but she didn't say a word. She honestly didn't seem to know what to say about this. He was pretty sure she hadn't ever believed he would come back and stand in her office once again. Hopefully she hadn't gave up on him, but she had her doubts. He was proud about showing her there had been no necesity to be doubtful. Her smile got wider and she started to ask him.

"Don't think me being rude, but I just have to ask this three questions."

"What final mark did you finish school with?"

"That would be an A, though it wasn't a good one, but at last..."

"You're kidding me, am I right? You are?"

"No..."

"That's unbelievable... So what do you do, what's your profession?"

"I'm with the FBI..."

"FBI? Federal Bureau of Investigation? I mean we're talking about the same institution?"

He had to laugh by her surprised questions.

"Yeah, it's a unit for the search of missing persons in New York."

"So, you still live there?"

"Yeah, since you send me there."

"You got a wife or children?"

"No."

"I just can't believe this. I mean – and don't get me wrong – but I didn't believe you would ever show up here again. I had doubts but I kept my faith in you making your way. But I never thought you would stand in this office once again. I thought you were angry with me, about what I told you and about sending you away..."

"I was – in the beginning, but I grew up and I became and adult and more mature and more reasonable – at last a little bit – and I realized every single word you said was true. I was unbearable and rude, carefree, selfish and arrogant. I really hadn't deserved another chance and you were right in sending me away. You had a hard time in deciding and I had a hard time in getting along, but I believe you honestly safed my life that day. I just came here to thank you..."

"There's something I would like to know. I'm absolutely clear about the fact, that it's normally against policy, but I thought maybe you would make an exception…"

"So, what is it."

"I would like to see the Stevensons…"

She hesitated for a few more moments, before she smiled once again.

"Bad conscious?"

"Probably - something like that. I would just like to explain a few things."

"I understand that. But I don't know if it's a good idea. I mean I know it's a long time ago, but I believe something broke the day they had to send you away. I don't wanna offend you for that now- you were just a child and you obviously made your way, but…"

"That's why I need to see them. I just need to tell them it was all about me – it was none of their fault. Don't you think they have a right to get to know this."

"Yes, they have and they should… The address is still the same. I think we could go there right now if you want to, I was supposed to visit them today either way…."

He interrupted her, seeming surprised.

"So they are still available as foster parents?"

"Yeah – they currently have taken custody of a 15 year old black girl – Tonya. Really nice girl, but very, very stubborn. It isn't always easy with her…"

"I believed they had given up on it…"

"After you left their house? It took them some time to take another child into custody. They were afraid to fail once again… But they got over it and since that day, they lead three more children to adolescence – a nurse, an electrician and a lawyer's assistant. Good children – all of them."

"You wanna tell them I will join you?"

"No, lets make a surprise out of it."


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27:

Jack arrived back at the office about three quarters of an hour later. He had got stuck in traffic and therefore he was the last one to be back here again. Sam, Martin and Vivian – who both had already returned from the Matthews' home – were already sitting at the wide conference table, the letters of Anna Mantego on the desk and a discussion spreading right now.

He stepped to the desk and interrupted them in their working routine as he questioned the current progress in their investigation.

"Anything?"

Vivian gave him a look of annoyance and Sam shot him a short evil smile before she responded, but not really answered his question.

"You have an awful bad timing – throwing Danny out today of all days, you know."

He frowned and gave her a surprised look. Finally he received an explanation from Vivian.

"The letters are all in Spanish – we should have thought about this much earlier... We're still waiting for the translation – will take some time."

"How long?"

"These are about 30 letters and we currently only have two other agents around, speaking Spanish. It'll probably take another hour or two. But I asked them to inform me if they found out anything unusual. Any names or addresses, stuff like that."

"Alright – let's take the time to sum up the results. And I guess – whatever his sister has written to him, it wouldn't be wrong to find out her exact address in Baja. Maybe she can help us, maybe she knows where her brother is."

Before they even got the chance to get started, the phone on Vivian's desk rang. She rose from her chair at the conference table, went over and picked up the phone. It was a short call and except for her approving several things, there was no more information given from her.

"It was one of the two agents working on the translation right now. He informed me, that there is one name frequently occurring in the letters and from the passages around it sounds like she knew about all the content of the letters."

"Who's name?"

Jack was pretty sure he already knew the answer to his question.

"Sara Peréz."

He looked at Sam and addressed her when he went on.

"So you and Danny had been right. She was actually lying. Whatever she knew about Joaquin and his sister, she hasn't told us. Maybe we should tell her we know?"

"But we don't even definitely know what Joaquin's sister was writing about!"

Martin insisted against Jack's proposal and he completely understood. It was risky – maybe Joaquin had just told his sister about his girlfriend and she really didn't know anything. But both – Sam and Danny – had been sure she was lying, so Jack believed it was worth a try.

"I know that, but it's a chance at least. We'll invite her to come here and then just see how she reacts. I don't think she will lie to us once again. She's a shy, young, teenage girl – I don't believe she has the courage to do it a second time, especially if she lacks of the security of her own private room."

Sam had already picked up the phone and was dialing a number.

"I'm gonna give her a call."

Sara arrived at the FBI's missing persons bureau about half an hour later. She had been almost terrified when agent Spade had called her and the fact that she had wanted her to come to the office and wouldn't question her at home once again, hadn't been a soothing factor after all. She hadn't told Sara why she needed to talk to her or what about in particular – she had just told her to come over for some more questions. Sara had taken the subway and for the whole ride she had been worrying about these few words: some more questions´. What did that mean? Why did she have to go there? Why didn't they just pay her a visit? What had they found out?

She tried to calm herself, not listening to her heart and emotions and tried to stay rational. She told herself it was nothing unusual and that she just needed to stay cool and restrained. There was no big deal about this questioning and she would be home in no time again. But her heart whispered all kinds of catastrophes to her: that they had found out she had kept some things for herself, that they would arrest her for that, that they wouldn't allow her to go home, that she would have to spend a night in jail. She had no idea which of the two voices she should listen to and believe in – the voice in her head or the voice in her heart.

When she got the high almost skyscraping building into sight, she couldn't help herself, but to swallow hard. This whole place was perfect to scare someone and it definitely worked on her. Agent Spade had told her to head upstairs to the bureau's lobby and that she would be awaiting her there. So she took another deep breath and entered the building. She took the elevator upstairs and – as she had promised – Agent Spade was already awaiting her. She handed an ID-card stating visitor´, which would allow her to enter this place. But something was wrong about this whole scene. Agent Spade seemed to have developed a completely different character over night. No smile, no friendly word would come from her lips – Sara felt treated like a criminal...

But – technically – that's what she was. She had lied to the two federal agents that had been questioning her, she had impeded with a federal investigation. And now they had found out about it, they knew it! Her mind told her she was just panicking and that she needed to calm down. There was no chance they had found out about this. She had been careful with the answers, she had given them. They couldn't have found out. She tried to relax, but the awkward feeling of being discovered stayed.

Samantha led Sara into one of the interrogation rooms and asked her to sit down and wait for a moment. She had closely observed the girls reactions and she had seen her nervousness, her fears and her doubts clearly. She seemed to be struggeling with herself, rather to see a catastrophy in this or to not take it too serious. The fight inside her seemed to still go on. She hadn't decided what to think about all this by now. And that was good – it was a good chance to confront her and to finally force her to tell the truth.

Sam entered the interrogation room behind Vivian, who Jack had wanted to join the interview with Sara. The girl looked confused – she didn't know Vivian and she looked scared, probably because she never had been in a room like this in a federal building. Sam introduced Vivian to her and then started their interview. They had agreed on giving Sara the one chance to confess on her own and if she wouldn't they would confront her, with what they found out.

"Sara, did Joaquin ever tell you about his sister?"

Both agents carefully scanned the girls face. Her eyes widened for a moment and they could see how she held her breath, but then both expressions vanished from her face and she answered in a slightly trembling voice and not looking at them.

"Sister? Joaquin doesn't have a sister."

"So you wanna tell us, you don't know about her?"

"No –yes I mean. NO, I don't know about her."

She was nervous, she was so goddamn nervous she started to lose control. She was getting trapped in her own answers. She was kind of confused. It was time to confront her.

"If you don't know her, how come she had been writing about you in the letters she was sending to Joaquin? How come she knows your name?"

"Maybe Joaquin told her about me, told her we were a couple."

"That's very interesting. But you should stop lying now, Sara."

"I'm not lying, I don't know her and I didn't know the hell about her letters. Joaquin never told me about Anna…"

It was too late until she realized that she had just traited herself. She accidently had confessed she had been lying and she was on the edge of crying due to her own stupidity. She had no chance to escape the inevitable any more. Both of the agents had realized it, too.

"If you don't know her, Sara – how come you know her name?"

She kept silent some more, breathing heavily right now and finally started to sob. Her voice was weak and shacky when she took the word again to finally explain the truth.

"Yes, I know her and yes, I have been lying. Joaquin asked me to do so, he asked me to not tell anyone. So I didn't - please don't be mad at me about it. I did it because I loved him – I would have done anything for him, if he asked me to. And he asked me to do this, so I did."

"Sara, if you really care about him, you need to tell us what you know. We need to find him, need to make sure he isn't in danger. You need to help us."

"He isn't in danger, believe me – I know it. He just wanted to see his sister…"

"So that's where he went to?"

She wouldn't answer the question, but they knew the answer was yes. They had finally found the one essential hint they needed to get a hold on Joaquin. The only thing they still needed to do was find the exact location, Joaquin's sister lived at right now. Shouldn't be too difficult.

"Sara, we don't blame you and you won't be punished for not telling us about it. You don't need to be afraid, okay?"

Her voice was still trembling when she responded, but she seemed to believe them. She wasn't that scared any more.

"Okay."

Sam gently squeezed her shoulder before she left the room.

"Someone will take you home. It's all okay."

The young teenage girl was more sad than scared right now, but she nodded approvingly.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28:

They arrived at the Stevenson's house about 20 minutes later and as they stepped out of the car, they could hear music, played loud enough it was still audible on the street and then somebody yelled in a none the less friendly voice.

"Tonya – turn down the music! This is no discotheque!"

It took some moments before an answer could be heard and Danny could see Julie smile. The music was audible up to the street in front of the house, as was the – after all friendly – yelling inside the house.

"Yeah Ruthie – goddamn it. I know that – you don't allow me the slightest bit of fun…"

"Don't you curse!"

"I know, I know – I'm already quiet. Do you at least allow me to listen my sacriligeous music with headphones, then I won't be disturbing you?"

"Whatever you want to – if it's just more quiet in the house and you won't forget to be downstairs for dinner in time."

The music was turned down a moment later and the yelling stopped. Julie used the moment of silence to ring the door bell. Once again they could hear Tonya's voice ring through the house.

"That's Lilly – Lilly's here for dinner! I'm opening"

A moment later steps were flying down the stairs and Ruth Stevenson insisted once again

"Tonya – for the last time, don't you use the stairs like this. It is…"

Tonya interrupted her and finished the sentence for her.

"No highway – I know Ruthie!"

A moment later the door opened and the face of a black teenage girl wearing jogging pants and a tank top appeared in the door frame. With an amount of enthusiasm and emotion she stepped to Julie and hugged her passionately

"Hey Lilly – that's so nice you're coming. There was something I wanted to show you…"

Tonya stopped in the middle of her sentence, when she finally realized that Julie wasn't alone. A frowning appeared on her happy face.

"Who's this?"

Ruth arrived at the front door right at that moment and the uneasy feeling Danny had since their drive to the Stevenson's place about this being wrong reached it's climax. He didn't know what to do, he didn't know what to say. He was left speechless by the sudden appearance of Ruth Stevenson. She still looked the same – of course she had gotten older, but she was still the same woman that had desperately tried to be amother for him 15 years ago. But he wouldn't let her – he had hurt her, hurt her deeply and here he was now – 15 years later, standing in the door frame of her house. Coming back to appologize – he asked himself if he even had a right to break into this familie's life once again. As he still remained silent – Julie took the initiative and now it was too late for him to change his mind and leave the place.

"Let's call him an old friend of the family…"

Ruth was slightly smiling, but she still seemed confused.

"Must be a very old friend indeed."

Danny final managed to find his voice once again – though it sounded rough and unbalanced.

"15 years to be exact – and I wouldn't call it a friend… I would call it a charge. You probably don't even remember me…"

A sudden moment of realazation rushed through the place. Ruth face's expression was unreadable – he had no idea what she was thinking about him and if she actually would let him step inside.

"Daniel?"

"I know you once told me you don't want me to ever enter this house again and I completely understand if you wouldn't let me in right now…"

Ruth didn't take her eyes from him, when she ordered to Tonya in an emotionless tone. As if she was afraid of what he was doing, if she turned her back on him.

"Tonya – upstairs, to your room, now!"

"Now that it's getting interesting…"

"I won't say this again – young lady!"

Tonya shot her a look full of annoyance, shrugged and climbed up the stairs once again. Danny was pretty sure she wouldn't enter her room. She was still standing up there, intensively listening to what they would be talking about.

"Why are you here?"

Now his chance had come, the chance to stop this silly episode in proceeding and leave this place, before it was too late, before he would hurt her once again.

"It wasn't a good idea – I'm sorry. I better leave…"

He was about to turn and leave, when Ruth grabbed him by his arm. She still seemed in doubt, but something about the expression on her face had changed. He wasn't sure what had actually caused it, but she seemed more willing to listen to him now.

"I never heard you say that before…"

"What do you mean?"

He was confused and not clearly sure what she was talking about. Her gaze became sad when she answered.

"I'm sorry – I never heard you say you were sorry for something."

He took a deep breath and gave her a look full of empathy and understand. His voice was calm, low and soothing when he answered her.

"That's why I'm here, that's why I came – to appologize. To finally tell you that I'm so deeply sorry."

Ruth face's expression closed in a bit again, but stayed still sad.

"It took you a long time…"

He had known this wouldn't be easy, he had known it before and still knew it now. But she had allowed him to stay, hadn't send him away in first place and was willing to listen to her. He had to try.

"I know that and I can only appologize because of this, too. But I wasn't even sure you would ever let me enter this house again. I made a lot of big mistakes and I deeply hurt you – to an extent, that I would understand if you never ever would want to see me again – as you once told me. Not even speaking about talking to me. But I decided to try none the less and it took me a lot of courage and as you already said it – time. I'm not even sure now, if it was the right thing to do and I'm still willing to leave if you want me to…"

She had looked into his eyes sceptically while he was talking and with every word – at last it seemed to be like that in his mind – her face had enlightened more and more. The sadness was still there, but something else had appeared now. It looked like hope. And then – a slight smile was visible on Ruth's face.

"Don't take it as an offence, but I can't believe you're still the same person that grew up in this house. You seem to have completely changed – I don't know how you managed it, but you did. I would like to hear about the man you became… And I would like to find out, where we went wrong…"

Now it was his turn to give her a sad smile.

"You didn't do anything wrong, actually… This was all about me. I had a hard time living when I entered your house and I wasn't willing – I mean never, not once in the whole time I was here – to let someone come close to me. I was stubborn, egoistic and I was very angry than and it was you, that had to suffer from the consequences. It was all my fault – there's nothing more to say about this. I wanted you to know that."

Ruth stepped closer to him, gently took him by the arm and squezzed it. Her eyes were watery and her voice was trembling when she responded.

"Thanks."

She said simply and he simled nervously, not sure what to say next. Ruth signaled him to come inside and leaded him and Julie to the living-room. She sat down and gave them an inviting gaze, so they followed her. Another this time no more sad, but friendly smile emerged from Ruth lips.

"Now tell me about the man you became."

Another nervous smile appeared – he wasn't sure what to tell her.

"Where am I supposed to start?"

"Tell me about your life, Daniel. Tell me what you became… Just tell me."

He breathed in deeply and directly looked at her afterwards.

"Okay…"


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29:

They met all back at the conference table and Vivian informed them about Sara Peréz' testimony. She told them that Sara knew about Joaquin's sister and that he probably had left to visit her.

Right then the phone on Vivian's desk rang and she hurried to take the call. She listened carefully, a short smile crossing her face before she hung up again.

"The translation is finished, we can go through the letters now."

"What about Anna Mantego's current address. Any luck?"

Martin answered the question with a sigh of frustration.

"I have been trying to talk to the authorities down in Baja, but we had a slight problem of communication. Her skills with the english language weren't the best. But she finally understood what I wanted her to look up for me – just that it doesn't help us in any way: Anna Mantego no longer has a current address in Baja, Mexico. Her flat was sold four days ago and she didn't leave a new address for the authorities of Baja. They have no idea where she has gone to."

"The letters don't state her full address either – they only say her name and the city she lived at. Post signatures all came from Baja."

"But the only connection between Joaquin and his sister were the letters. And if she left Baja she must've told him. Her current residence must be written down somewhere inside these letters – otherwise he wouldn't have known where to go to."

One of the bureau's agents headed to the desk, the box with the letters in his hands. He put them down on the table and received a nod from Jack before he left once again. He didn't even need to state orders. Everyone grabbed a bunch of the translated pages and started to read.

Complete silence fell onto the room they were sitting in, while they were all quietly reading, searching for any kind of useful information that would help them to find Joaquin. It took some time – especially the older letters didn't state anything interesting, but about 20 minutes into flipping through the letters, Sam was the first to find something interesting.

"Hey guys – listen to this:

Jo, there is something I need to tell you and please don't be afraid or anything. But I had to see the doctor two days ago and he told me he believes I may be really sick. I think that's all bullshit and he only wants me to pay a lot of money for his diagnosis, that finally states that everything is okay. But he did a blood testing none the less (that I will have to pay for of course) and he asked me to come back in next week. It's probably nothing, but I wanted you to know..."

Sam searched for the following letter, Anna had send to Joaquin and scanned through it to find the passage about the results from the blood testing. Reading it by herself caused a reaction of disbelief and anxiety from her.

"Good lord,..., listen:

Remember that I told you about my miserable doctor and the blood testing? I got back my results yesterday. He must be totally crazy and he's definitely wrong! You don't need to worry after all – the goddamn charlatan – I'm fine. He told me the blood results show I'm HIV positive! Isn't that a mess – have you ever heard about anything more stupid. HIV positive – ha! He's definitely wrong. He has done a second testing and results will be back in two days."

It was the last letter in line that Sam was holding in hands. Martin was going on reading out the results of Anna's second testing.

"Jo, I'm so sorry. Please don't panic – I'll take care of myself. But it seems the doc has been right. The second blood testing came back positive, too. He told me that would explain why I've been sick so often in the past few months. My immune system is shutting down. But I won't give up and I don't want you to worry."

The next letter Anna had sent to her brother sounded much more sad and desperate – there lay a distance of time of more than two weeks between the last letter and this one. Considering the normal timeframe, she had taken pretty much time to write him again. This letter must've arrived at Joaquin about the time his behavior started to change that dramatically. Martin read out loud.

"Hey boy – sorry for not writing you for such a long time. But – to admit it to you – I don't feel so good right at the moment. I needed some time to rest and recover from a bad cold. The doc – a current visitor of mine right now – told me my immune system is getting weaker and weaker and that I can't stay at home much longer. He wants me to go to a hospital. I'm still sorting out what to do right now. I feel so weak and tired – I just don't know what to do. But – hey – don't you worry about your big sister. I'm just a little depressed right now. I'll be okay. I'll write back to you as soon as I feel a bit stronger again."

Martin was done with the useful information of his letters now and Vivian flipped through hers to find something else that would help them. She finally found what they needed to know.

"Here it is – and I told them to inform me if they find anything of importance – the address we were searching for:

I decided to listen to the goddamn doctor for once and get to a hospital. I really don't feel so good again and I barely get out of bed. I decided to give up the flat, for I don't know when I'll be back and I will get to Cancun. The doctor advised me to do so – he said that at the places most tourist go to, they have the best doctors. He got a bed in a clinic for me. I will be leaving in a few days. Just so you know where to send your letters then – hope you'll still be writing to your poor sister(!) – this is the address:

Clinica medical

Ave. Suyaxchen # 59

Cancun

Please don't be mad at me that I finally gave up although I promised not to, but it's really hard to resist the tiredness... Hope to hear from you soon."

Jack picked the one last letter, with the latest date and read it out loud – it was pretty short, but it was written in the most desperate tone of all of them.

"Hey bro – sorry, I know it (once again) took me some time to answer you. I really wished to send a letter, but I'm lying in bed almost all day being tired. They give me all kind of drugs to keep my immune system up, but I never believed it's much of a use. I feel so useless right now – I'm only getting on the nurses' nerves. That's all I'm able to do. But I have been talking to the doctor yesterday and he told me that I may have a timeframe left of about two weeks, maybe a month. I'm dying – Jo. God, I'm so scared. I didn't even know if I should tell you. But I didn't want you to get an anonymous letter from the goddamn hospital. I wanted to tell you myself. I just hope my courage won't leave me on my last days. Please don't be sad Jo, please don't cry – this is meant to be. Don't fight against it.

With all the love one person can have for another (and I really mean that Jo! I deeply love you!)

Your sister Anna…"

"She's dying. That's why he ran away. He wanted to be by her side, didn't want her to be all alone. That's where he went to."

Martin resumed the results of their investigation – the content of the letters were speaking in a clear voice. They had found Joaquin, had found out where he had disappeared to.


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30:

They had called the hospital in Cancun and one of the nurses – speaking fluent English – told them they had a patient named Anna Mantego and that she frequently had been visited by a young man. Their suspicion had been approved, Joaquin had actually gone to Mexico to take the last chance to see his sister. They had found him.

The nurse at the hospital wouldn't give them any information about Anna. Not on the phone. She told them if they wanted to know they needed to talk to the doctor in person. The only information they got from her – which slightly happened by accident – was that Joaquin's sister had been transferred to ICU yesterday. That was information enough to know, that she wasn't in a good shape. She was dying and Joaquin probably knew this. He would be there for her, trying to soothe her.

They had been talking to the Matthews, explaining the situation to them. They had been deeply moved about Anna's fate and about Joaquin's decision to be by her side. Sure they still were angry that he ran away, but it seemed to surprise them to see that there actually had been a good reason for Joaquin's running. They seemed almost ashamed, that they hadn't trusted in him more, that they hadn't believed he would be responsible enough to not make a wrong decision. But he hadn't disappointed them, not even for a minute.

Of course he couldn't stay down there in Mexico. He still was a teenager and he was supposed to be under the custody of his foster parents. The decision was made to fly down there and take him home. But they would give him the time he needed to say goodbye to his sister. They wouldn't force him to leave. He had every given right to stay by her side until it was finally over.

The flight down to Cancun took about 4 hours. The Matthews had insisted to join them, but this hadn't been an option. Apart from the fact that it would act against normal policy, Jack didn't want to overwhelm the boy. Dealing with the situation his sister was in and the sudden appearance of FBI was definitely enough. Forcing him to deal with the emotions and comments of his foster parents right then was something Jack wished to keep from him. The Matthews had been arguing with him for a while, but they seemed to understand that they wouldn't get through. So they stopped trying it.

When they arrived at the hospital in Cancun it was already getting dark. The nurse had informed them that the doctor who was in charge of Anna's case would be working until 10 p.m. Therefore they were still in time. But the visiting times of ICU were long over, so Joaquin wouldn't be there. Except his sister's condition was that bad, that life-threatening that the doctors and nurses would bend the rules.

"Joaquin?"

The boy wouldn't answer him. He was just sitting there without moving an inch. His face didn't show any emotion, not even in the slightest way. He seemed lost, empty, traumatized and Jack wouldn't have needed the doctor's explanation to know that Anna had died. Joaquin had just lost the last member of his corporal family. It would take time – time to grieve, time to deal with it – and right now it definitely wasn't the best situation to disturb him. But as much as Jack would've wished for Joaquin to have the chance and the time, he couldn't stay here. He tried once again to reach the boy.

"My name's Jack Malone, I'm with the FBI. We have been looking for you for the past two days..."

Still no reaction – not even a turn of his head or a nod that would tell Jack, Joaquin understood what he was telling him. There was absolutely nothing.

"Your foster parents were very worried and they are eagerly waiting for your return. They asked me to tell you that they aren't mad at you and that they deeply care about you. They wanted me to ask you to come back."

This caused a reaction from Joaquin, a reaction Jack didn't like. He let out a disbelieving snort. But he still wouldn't move from his position. Jack moved a bit closer to him, but he didn't dare to touch the boy.

"It's no lie, Joaquin. They really care about you a lot and they want you to come back."

Joaquin still wouldn't look at him, he was still staring into some unknown direction with his empty emotionless eyes.

"I won't go back. I won't go anywhere."

The boy was traumatized – one didn't need a shrink to see that. He felt all alone in the world, having lost everything that still connected him to his former life. He had lost a part of his identity.

"Joaquin, I know this is hard for you..."

There it was and Jack had known this would happen. All the emotion the boy was hiding behind this lifeless eyes suddenly jumped out of him in an outburst of screamed words and curses.

"You know? You understand? You don't understand a damn thing! You don't have the hell of an idea what this feels like! You don't know anything about me! You don't know how I feel! So keep the hell away from me and don't tell me you understand – cause that's bullshit!"

"You're right. I don't know you and I don't know how you feel. But I know that you loved your sister very much. You loved her so much you were willing to take all the way down here and stay by her side to support her. I know you're angry about what has happened to her, you're angry about her fate and yours as well. You don't understand the sense of all this and you don't want to go on like that."

Joaquin wouldn't answer to him, which made Jack pretty sure that he wasn't too far away from Joaquins' feelings. He knew the boy had been troubled before and right now he was deeply sad and angry. Feeling lost and all alone. There was no way Jack could do anything against it right now, Joaquin needed to do this all for himself and he would need time, a lot of time. But at least he had reached him for the moment.

"You probably don't wanna hear about this right now, but you aren't alone..."

"But she's dead! Anna is dead! She is gone! Forever! She won't ever come back! She left me alone..."

Jack took a pause to give Joaquin the chance to calm down a bit, before he started once again.

"There are other people that care for you. There are people that love you. In the past couple of days we have been talking to so many people, who were deeply concerned about you. They were all worried about you and they all wanted you to come back."

Another snort came from Joaquins' lips, but Jack knew he was just trying to protect himself, tried to keep his feelings under control. The boy was curious - he was interested to know who these people were, Jack was talking about.

"That's not true! Who should that be?"

"Your foster parents were deeply worried about you – both of them, your social-worker has been deeply afraid that you were in danger and your girlfriend Sara – she loves you so much that she was willing to lie for you. She has been lying to a federal agency, she has gotten herself into trouble. All for you.

Your foster parents wanted to join us so they could make sure you were alright. I had to argue with them for more than half an hour before they gave up insisting. People care for you, you just have to let them in."

Joaquin had silenced now, no comment would emerge from his lips. It seemed like he needed to think about this, like he had to come clean with his thoughts and feelings before he would be able to respond. His voice was shaky when he spoke again.

"That's not true."

"Why should I be lying to you, Joaquin?"

"Because you want me to go back!"

Jack gave him a short sad smile to this response.

"I don't need to convince you to go back. I got all the authority I need to take you back. I don't need your agreement to do so. The only thing I want is for you to understand that you're not alone. I'm not lying to you."

The silence lasted longer this time and Jack could see how the expression on the teenager's face changed. His expression got softer and less tensed and sad. He seemed to start to believe in Jack's words.

"They really wanted to join you?"

"Yes, they did. You can ask them yourself when you're back. You may even ask them right now if you wish to call them?"

"And Sara – she kept her promise? She lied for me?"

"She did. We had to scare her off quiet a lot before she was willing to talk to us..."

"That's ... amazing."

"No, Joaquin – it's normal if people care for someone."

"May I call them? The Matthews, I mean."

"Sure."

Joaquin was on the phone with the Matthews in a private room for about half an hour. Jack couldn't believe what he saw when Joaquin left the room again. He seemed reliefed and even content. Whatever he had heard from the Matthews had obviously changed – at least parts of – his opinion about their attitude towards them.

"They are still on the phone. They would like to talk to you."

He was informed by Joaquin, which made him frown slightly. But he entered the room and picked up the phone, addressing the Matthews.

"Agent Malone, this is David Matthews. I would like to ask you a favor…"

"What would that be."

"We agreed with Joaquin to take some days off and meet him down in Cancun. We don't want to force him to come back right now. He needs some time, at least until his sister's funeral will be over and I guess there are a few things that need to be taken care of now that she has died. We don't want the boy to be all alone and we don't want him to have to leave. We would like to give him some time to grieve and take the time to come clean with his troubles. We agreed to take a flight tomorrow and meet him in a hotel in Cancun. I would like to ask you to take care of Joaquin to get a room for the night…"

"You want me to let him stay? All alone?"

"That would be the favor I'm asking you for. I don't believe he will run again. He just wants to stay down there until his sister is burried. He wants to stay by her side – and I fully understand that. He was wrong in not telling us where he was going, but he didn't disappoint us. He had a noble reason for leaving. We for our part trust him to not disappoint us this time."

"You know that I can't take any respnsibilty…"

"Yes, I know that. I'm not asking you to do it. Would you take care of him for tonight? Would you agree to the favor I ask you for?"

Jack knew he couldn't decide this by reason. Deciding it that way would end up with a traumatized Joaquin sitting in a plane back to New York leaving his dead sister – the only family member he still had had – all behind and not having the chance to say goodbye to her and properly grieve. He had to listen to his heart to decide this and his heart only allowed one option as the right one.

"We will be taking care of him…"

"Thanks Agent Malone – we deeply have to thank you."


	31. Final Chapter

Chapter 31:

Danny had come back home deep in the night yesterday. He had thought about taking some time to sleep long, but he knew he couldn't skip another day of work. The longer he stayed away the harder it would get to convince Jack to stop being mad about his behavior. He knew there would've been other ways to clear the situation – like taking a few days off – but he had been angry about Jack's decision to keep him out of the Matthews case. He had made a decision by impulse and he had been wrong with it. But there was nothing he could do about this right now.

When he entered the bureau the following morning, he was pretty happy it was Sam, not Jack, who was the first person to meet this morning. She looked almost surprised to see him – like she hadn't believed he would dare to turn up so soon. She sounded slightly nervous when she addressed him with a little smile.

"Hey."

"Hey."

"So, you're back in town."

"Yeah."

He paused and studied her face for a moment.

"You look pretty content – anything I missed?"

"We found Joaquin Matthews..."

"That's great! Where did you find him?"

Sam didn't want to tell him about Joaquin's sister's death. Danny had been that emotional about the boy, she feared telling him that Joaquin just lost a beloved sister would provoke a deeply emotional reaction from her co-worker. She didn't want that to happen – not again. Therefore she decided to skip that part of the story.

"He visited his corporal sister – in Mexico..."

"Mexico? That's quiet a trip. How the hell did he get there?"

"He must've been planning this for a while. He admitted that he frequently took money from the Matthews to be able to pay the flight to Cancun. The decision to leave had been made long before that night's fight with his foster parents. How about you? How do you feel?"

"I'm fine – or let's say: better. There were a couple of things I had to think about and that's what I took my time for."

Sam nodded and sighed soundlessly – she had hoped not to be the one to inform him.

"Jack would like to have a chat with you..."

Danny could see the nervousness laying in her gesticulation and mimic. She was troubled about sending him to their boss and he completely understood it. But he hadn't expected any different reaction from Jack. He would trounce him to not simply disappear from work ever again and he definitely would be interested if he took his advice. Danny gave an assuring smile to Sam and went for Jack's private office. This was going to be the real hard part of it. He knocked and entered, carefully closing the door behind him. He tried a smile, but having a look at Jack's face, he stopped immediately. Jack ordered him to sit down and an awkward silence emerged between them before Jack finally took the word once again.

"Where the hell have you been for the past three days!"

He knew he needed to get a hold on his temper and stay calm right now. Getting cocky with his boss, would only make the situation worse. But he actually didn't want to inform him, didn't want to let him in. There was a particular reason why a "private sphere" was called like this – it was private, not meant for anyone else and Danny wished to keep it private. There were too many, too dark secrets about his past and he didn't feel like anyone, especially his boss, needed to know about them. But if he wanted to keep the discusssion he was about to have on a constructive path, he had at least to reveal parts of his privacy.

"I've been down in Florida…"

He stated in a hesitating voice and Jack needed some seconds to realize what he had just told him. He hadn't seemed to believe he would actually get an open hearted answer to that question. It seemed to calm him down a little at least.

"And what did you do down in Florida, for heaven's sake? You were supposed to be working!"

He really had difficulties to keep his feelings at bay and not shout at his boss, not tell him, that he hadn't asked him to work´. He had asked him to step away from their case, he had put him on desk duty – that had nothing to do with work. But he swallowed the comment down and tried to keep rational. But he could hear the slight trembling in his voice when he answered.

"I know that! But I did what you asked me for…"

"I didn't ask you to skip work and leave town!"

"No, you didn't, but you asked me to get rid of the troubles that intervened with my working routine."

"So you wanna tell me that's what you did in Florida? That's hard to believe."

"I know it is, but that's the way it happened.

Jack's furious expression seemed to soften right now. They knew each other for quiet a while, for a pretty long time to be exact and Jack knew, Danny wouldn't lie to him. He would keep things private from time to time, but he would never openly lie to his face.

"I guess you don't wanna tell me about it?"

"Yeah, that's right and I'm sorry about it. I know you would want me to tell you, but it's…"

"Private?"

"Exactly. I don't wanna talk about it. Let's just say that there were a few things that had been occurring a long time ago, I had to come clean with."

"And you did?"

"I tried to. I just hope it worked."

"And you believe it worked out that well, these troubles you had won't intervene with work any more?"

"I'm not absolutely sure, but I hope so. At least I feel ready to restart."

"That's good. You know I'm not happy about the way you did it, but I appreciate that you listened to the advice I gave you."

"Desk duty?"

"Exactly – get to work."

A little smile crossed his face when Jack was allowing him to leave. This had worked out better than he actually had expected. But in the end he hadn't done the wrong thing. It was just the how´ that had been a little out of place. Just like Joaquin Matthews – the thought suddenly crossed his mind and made him smile even more. He definitely had been right with the feeling that he and that missing teenager had some things in common – except for the mostly bad experiences of the past. Of course they both had lost a family, they both had to experience the life in a foster family and they both hadn't been happy with the decisions others had made for them. But apart from that, they both seemed to be stubborn, independent characters, trying to come clean with the inevitable situations of the past they hadn't been able to do anything against and it seemed to work out.

That at least was what Danny hoped for when he left Jack's office, still wearing that little smile on his face – for himself and for Joaquin.

THE END


End file.
